After the Rain- Josh Kiszka

Chapter 22- Accepting Defeat

I left the office in a tizzy, trying to hold in my snot and tears, but failing miserably, leaving me a sloppy, emotional mess as I made my way to my car. I drove to Lina's daycare to pick her up, knowing that having my daughter was the only truly consistent factor in my life, especially in times of crisis, and I sought out the comfort she brought me.

As a drove the route to the daycare, I called Teagan to let her know what had just happened.

"Hey." She answered.

"Hi, any chance you'd be able to talk right now? No, worries if you're busy." I began, knowing that she had been pretty preoccupied with work and not wanting to be a bother.

"I guess, what's up?" She continued.

I took a deep breath to settle myself.

Before I could begin, she beat me to the punch, "If this is about Josh though, I don't really want to hear it."

"What?" I asked, dumbfounded.

"I've had enough of that."

"While it's not directly  about him." I said, not really wanting to discuss Josh, but instead wishing to let her know about my job situation, or lack thereof. 

"Oh god." Teagan groaned at my response.

"Are you okay? Did I do something?" I asked, confused about her recent bout of moodiness.

"I'm just sick of you bitching about Josh." She stated plainly.

"All I'm trying to do is tell you about my life, and just because it involves Josh doesn't mean you have to be rude to me." I laughed in shock.

"Celine! Enough! It's always about you and your problems I can't deal anymore!" She shouted on the other end of the line.

"W-what?" I couldn't believe that this was happening.

"I can't stand to listen to you and your baby daddy drama another minute. This situation could've been easily avoided if you had just listened to me in the first place! I told you it would bite you in the ass if you weren't honest with him from the get go and now that it has, all I can say is I told you so. You're so fortunate, you have such a good life, you're blessed with a gorgeous child which is something most people wish and pray for, something I wish and pray for, so stop feeling sorry for yourself and just shut up."

I hung up the call without another word and let out a frustrated scream.

No boyfriend, no job, and now, no best friend.

I was repeatedly being kicked while I was down, and I prayed that it would all end at some point soon, and I wouldn't have to suffer any longer. I was at a loss and I didn't know how I would proceed.

How can I turn this all around? 

I quickly picked up my baby from daycare and drove home as fast as I could without risking a potential speeding ticket, which would have been the cherry on top of this perfect day. When I got back to my apartment, I sat Lina down in her bouncy chair, flicking on the TV to play a show for her.

As I sat on my couch, I heard a knock on the door. I wasn't expected anyone and my heart fluttered at the potential that Josh could be the one knocking. I hoped that he was willing to figure things out with one another.

I ran my fingers through my hair and wiped my teary eyes in an attempt to make myself look more presentable. I drew in a deep breath as I took the doorknob in my hand, ready to finally face him once again. I opened the door and my face fell when the mystery figure behind the door was not Josh, but was in fact Mikey.

"Mikey, just go away. I don't want to hear it if you're here to gloat now that Josh dumped me or if you're trying to make a pass at me, just stop." I groaned, moving to shut the door on him.

He stuck his arm out to prevent the door from closing and began, "No, Celine, that's not it. Listen, I know that I haven't been a great friend to you recently and I want to apologize."

"Now is not the time for that either, I am not in the mood and we aren't friends." I laughed incredulously, turning to leave him behind.

"I wanted to preface the real reason that I'm here with that, but I know you could use a friend right now, and I want to be there for you." He said as he took a step into my apartment and closed the door behind him.

"It's too late for that, Mikey." I said, waving him off and making my escape to my bedroom.

"You shouldn't have to go through this alone." He protested.

I turned back to face him, "But don't I deserve to? I make everyone else's problems my own, I'm so selfish."

"No, you're not." He reassured me, placing a hand on my shoulder.

I wanted so badly to believe him.

"Then why does Teagan seem to think so?" I shot back.

He rolled his eyes and sighed, "Teagan was just upset, she didn't mean any of what she was saying."

"Well, how do you know? because I feel like there was definitely truth to her words." I pressed, certain that Teagan was truly upset with me.

"Maybe, but I also think she was projecting. She and Chris just found out they might not be able to have kids, so I feel like she may resent the fact that you can." He shrugged.

My face fell, "W-what? Why didn't she tell me?"

"I dunno, maybe she felt like she didn't want to burden you with her problems because you have your own to deal with?"

"Ugh, but that's all I do to her..." I groaned, taking my face in my hands.

"No, it's not. Celine, it's not a bad thing to rely on your support system when you're going through a tough time. You do a lot for Teagan, you're a good friend." He said, pulling me into his arms and placing a kiss atop my head.

"My life is a mess." I sniffled.

"Everything will be okay. I promise you." He said, squeezing me tighter in his arms.

If I had the capacity to put emotions aside and think rationally, I would've hated his embrace, but something about it was so deeply comforting, I was willing to forgive him, at least for the time being.

I pulled away from his hold and looked up at him, "Mikey, do you mind sticking around for a bit? I just need some time to myself, but I need someone watch Lina."

"Yeah, o-of course. Anything for you." He said, eager to help out.

"Thanks." He nodded, acknowledging my gratitude and released me from his arms. "Remote is on the coffee table, help yourself to anything in the kitchen." I said as I made my way down the hallway and into the bathroom to take a shower.

As I closed the bathroom door, I hoped that letting Mikey back into my life wouldn't prove to be a mistake.