INSOMNIAC [ tbp cast ]

E - " maybe he'll love me ,,

TW ( our first 🥺🥺 ) UNDERAGE DRINKING!! i won't be sharing my opinion cuz i don't want ppl to be angy at me lol

viktorpetrovv

viktorpetrovv a little sad but maybe he'll love me someday

comments

finncuomo babe text me ☹️☹️
viktorpetrovv finncuomo on it

finn

viktor
ok so

i just feel like maybe i should stop texting him
and like leave him alone? because maybe i am
actually annoying and someone he doesn't want
to talk to so much?? but a part of me wants to
believe that i'm likable??

but maybe he does like me as a friend and i
should come to terms with it, but it could also
be because i've never had a healthy man by
my side that i'm hoping he can fill the void?

i sound attached but it's just so

annoying

finn
ok listen vik

ilysm with my whole heart but for once
please don't be an idiot. okay? maybe he
does like you and just doesn't wanna say
anything yeah, and you should believe
that and not say anything else because
maybe he likes you too? no one but he
knows okay

you just have to hold onto that sliver of
hope that he likes you.

viktor has turned on do not disturb!
notify anyways?

THOUSANDS OF THOUGHTS RAN THROUGH HER HEAD,  was she being creepy? probably not, but she wouldn't let herself believe that she was being normal.

she decided she'd just stay away from him, if he wanted to talk to her he'd come. but he wasn't.

she rested her head back before getting up and walking to her closet, she hid a lot of things in there. like vodka, cigarettes, and marijuana. she hardly smoked, she decided tonight she'd get high and drunk maybe.

she pulled out the pre-made blunts and lit it, inhaling the taste of marijuana and exhaling it to the air. her door was locked and her window was opened. there was something at the bottom of her door to lock in the smell and smoke.

for five minutes, Viktor remained there, listening to Insane Clown Posse and Pierce the Veil, drinking and smoking - she'd lost herself in the taste of vodka, the bitter taste no longer bothered her.

brady_hepner

viktor
yk, finn always tells me not to text when i do
these stupid things i do but i wanted to text u
to like get to know u and to just talk to u idk

ur probs gonna ignore this message and idk
i don't blame u 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

finn also tells me i'm emotional when i'm
out of it lol

but what does she know right

brady
what does "out of it" mean, Viktor?

viktor
what's your favorite color??

mine is green, but not normal neon green,
i really like the light greens bc it always
reminds me of my grandmas yarn that she
always knits with

brady
Viktor, what's going on?

viktor
it's a lot, unless u don't mind if i vent
to u abt smth stupid??

brady
go ahead, Viktor.

viktor
don't tell my mom, but whenever i get
really sad or mad or smth i get really high
or really drunk

and rn i'm both because i'm stupid and i
like this guy who proabbly doesn't want
anything to do with me but i don't wanna
believe it and i'm ignoring all my friends
because i'm a pussy who can open up to
most people when i'm sober

and this guy is amazing

he seems super funny and he's my type
but he just wants to be friends and i now
feel like i have to push him away bc who
am i to open up abt my feelings??

brady
i'm sorry about everything that's going on,
Viktor. alright, but maybe this guy has a
reason? and maybe you should talk to your
friends, i mean, they care about you.

viktor
maybe finn was right and i am an emotional
drunk

but i can't tell them because then they'll tell
my mom and she'll be super super angry bc
of what i'm doing

from mars
felt like writing sad stuff idk how was it tho idk if i'm good at angst or nah