I played Jadens songs for cooper while crying because Landon texted me saying he wanted to break up which is as fine with I guess and because I miss Cooper
Once I got home I walked in and saw everyone on the couch when I say everyone I mean
Travis
Bama
Landon
Kells
Megan
And Jaden
I ran to Jaden and he saw my tears and knew exactly what was wrong he hugged me while I sobbed I heard Landon get up and leave but no one stopped him cuz they were focused on me
You: I can't do this I can't not without cooper I miss having him to get food I miss listening to music I miss his opinions on my music I mis everything about him
I say into jadens chest
I stopped looked up with mascara running done my face looked around looked at Jadens now mascara stained and tear and snot soaked white shirt and ran upstairs I put the tests on the counter grabbed my blade I hid and left a few cuts I hid the blade again washed the cuts put on coops hoodie I kept that he left in my car and put on my socks and went back downstairs
Jaden: You we're up there for a bit are you ok
He says as he looks at my thighs and I knew what was coming next
You: Y-Yea I'm F-Fine
I say scared yet nervous
Jaden: Wrists
You look at everyone in the room and shake your head no
Jaden: Alexa Jane Kardashian Wrists now
I lifted up my sleeves revealing old scars and the fresh cuts
Everyone stares jaden just shakes his head I knew he was disappointed he grabbed some stuff from the cupboard bandaged my wrist and pulled my sleeve down and hugged me tight and sat me on the counter
Jaden: Plz don't do this again Lex I can't loose another perosn rn
You: I'm sorry I just can't take the pain
Jaden: You worked so hard to stop and Cooper helped do you think he'd be happy if he knew you were doing this again
You shake your head no
Jaden: So stop don't do it anymore ever again ok
You nod and wrap your legs around his torso and hug him he Carry's me to the couch
Kells: Hey Jaden we have to go to finish up Coops color for UnDn laqr
You: Can I come plz
Kells: Yea ofc
Jaden stands with you still around his torso and you guys get in the car you in back jaden and kells infront I say in the back thinking
You: Can we stop and get blueberry pancakes plz
Jaden: Sure
You hear him whispering to kells
Jaden: They we're coops favorite
Kells: Ok that's fine whatever makes her happy she needs some closure or whatever it's called rn
You drifted into your own little world for a bit until you guys got to IHOP you guys walked in and got seated in the back by yourselves and then they took your order you off got blueberry pancakes same with jaden kells got smiley pancakes which made you laugh cuz he was so happy about it you guys ate and then left to where UnDn Laqr makes the polish you spotted the color jaden has chose and it was so pretty you knew coop would love it since they were just checking that it was finished we walked over to where everything was already boxed and stuff and kells grabbed a couple boxes that had the polish in them he handed me a few and Jaden a few I thanked kells and he hugged me I asked him to take me and Jaden to Jadens since I had moved most of my stuff there the day coop died once we got there I went to the room coop would stay in and put his hoodie in the same spot he'd always keep it I took another hoodie and a pair of his sweats I went into the bathroom and showered and then went back to coops room and put his cologne on I then grabbed a lighter and a cigarette and sat on the roof looking at the sky
Jaden: You know smoking kills
You: Then looks like I'm gonna die
He hugs you and you put your head on his shoulder
You: You see that cloud that looks like a angel
Jaden: Yea
You: It's cooper telling us he's in heaven and is safe
Jaden: I bet he's having fun eating unlimited blueberry pancakes
You get a call
You: Hello
Cop: Hello is this Ms.Alexa kardashian
You: Yes it is
Cop: We found some things on Mr.Noriega and we think you might want to see them and have them
You: some me and my friend will be there soon
You: Jaden the cops found some stuff on coop taht they said we might want well I may want
Jaden: Ok let's go
We get off the roof and into the car and drive to the station we walk in and they come to us and hand me a bag and say to sit
The bag had his wallet keys lighter cigarettes a few photos a ring and a bracelet and a small perfume bottle
You: M-My perfume and bracelet and ring and P-Photos of me and him jaden he had these things
Jaden: That proves how much he loved you
I look closer in the bag and there's a note
You: A note
Jaden: Read it
You: Dear Lexi We have been friends forever you were there through it all and when I needed someone I remember when we were in the 7th grade and you got your period and bled through so I had to give you my hoodie I remember when you first cut yourself and told me and we worked through it together I just want you to know that I'll always be here and I love you so much Love Cooper
You: I-
Jaden hugs you
You: thank you officer
He nods and me and Jaden leave
You sat in the car staring out the window you rolled it down and lit a cigarette and blew some smoke out and inhaled more and blew it out jaden just stared at you
You: Sometimes i wonder what it's be like if-
Jaden: Don't finish the rest
I just look back out the window and smoke my cigarette once we got home I ran to coops room and layers on his bed that smelt like him I grabbed a photo I took of him that I set up in here along with others since this was now like his memorial room
You: God how I wish you were here my sweet angel plz do say hi to my grandpa for me I will forever keep your legacy going till the day I die I will make sure everyone knows how sweet and special you were I'll tell people your story and let them know they aren't alone I love you Angel
I put the photo down and got on my phone and made a TikTok
