e l e v e n

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Aan wada hadalno waa aan heshiino.

~ Let us talk, so we can reconcile ~

~ Let us talk, so we can reconcile ~

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SHERMAKE

Shermake has settled down, left with nothing but confusion, and an empty feeling in his heart. It was revealed to him the truth about his brother but how should he feel about this? The hate instilled in him since childhood and all his preconceived notions on mermaids had they really all been a lie? A false narrative fed to him by an angry, grieving father who needed someone to blame? Shermake felt overwhelmed by the thought, he didn't know what to do. All the anger and confusion, he didn't know where to put it all.

After Tawfiq, Shermake had seen how his father had changed, his gaze was a little colder, and he steeled his heart so he would appear strong to everyone. However, Shermake knew how his father would always wake up before dawn, put on his sandals, and sneak out of the house silently. He would follow him from behind in secret, weaving in and out of the stone houses in his path, past the boats and the fishing deck onto the beach, only to see the back of a broken man staring at the ocean waves in silence for hours on end, till the sun would rise. 

He would stand there, and pray for his son, and sometimes allow himself to remember the days that the three of them would live together, remember how his eldest would smile, make jokes to lighten the mood, and help Shermake who would cower behind his older brother feel more comfortable talking to his father. Shermake knew that his father was more than anger, that despite him having to be a strong man, that he too had been vulnerable to the emptiness that his brother left in his absence. 

Sometimes, he wondered if his father would ever be more than the shell of a man he once was, and sometimes he wondered if his father would ever let him into his lonely world. Instead of shutting him out so coldly, like a stranger. Maybe he was just too afraid to lose him too, and that's why he pushed so hard, and ever so often, a bit too hard. 

He was suddenly bombarded by a memory of his brother, this seemed to happen often as of late, making his heart yearn for him as if the constant reminder that he would never be him, he wasn't enough.

Shermake was on the beach, trying to waste time instead of training with his father when he noticed a still small sand crab. Usually they like to be buried under the sand on hot days such as today, but this one was barely moving.

He bent down and it was very faint but he could've sworn he heard the crab say 'thirsty'. He ran to the ocean and cupped some water into his palms and carefully walked back to the crab and doused it with the salt water.

It did a small wiggle, reminiscent of a dance he often saw the crabs do, and it hummed in thanks. Shermake smiled and softly caressed the hard shell with his finger. "You are welcome."

Shermake pushed the crab with his finger so it would bury itself under the sand but it came back each time, nuzzling his hand. "Don't you want to go home, little one?" He asked. It didn't say anything but it looked up at him, the emotion inside its small eyes saying more than words ever could. He was then overwhelmed with a feeling of belongingness, one he never felt at home. It nuzzled Shermake's hand and crawled into his palm, it's little legs tickled as it moved.

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