Haunted Hearts

21

Rufus's question rattled around in Elphi's brain, tormenting her as she escaped down the hall.

"Shall I take this concern for my welfare to mean you've grown fond of me?"

If only her feelings for him could be described with such a lackluster word.

It would be safer if she was merely fond of him. But she wasn't. She loved him with every beat of her heart and every breath in her body.

Elphi had even tried tempering it a couple days ago by writing a list to prove she hadn't known Rufus long enough to love him as much as she did.

However, she should have known that anything where her heart and Rufus were concerned never went according to plan because she ended up making two lists while he was out meeting with a prospective client.

The first was to test how well she'd come to know her husband over the past twenty-two days of their marriage—which was far more than she'd realized. And the second list materialized as a result of the first, blooming into a revelation of all Rufus's many qualities she'd come to love and admire.

1. He's loyal
2. He's reliable
3. He's trustworthy
4. He's selfless
5. He's bold
6. He's sarcastic
7. He's witty
8. He's self-reliant
9. He's brave
10. He's persistent

But then Rufus had walked in on her scribbling away at his desk, so she'd stuffed both lists among other notes and scraps of paper before he could see what she was writing. Later that night, she'd snuck down after he'd fallen asleep, intent on throwing them in the fire, but they were nowhere to be found.

She wanted to confront Rufus about the lists or, at the very least, figure out if he'd discovered and hidden them away. And Elphi would have—if she wasn't consumed by a horrible fear that he would end up dead if she confessed that she loved him.

It seemed to happen that way to Bradford, Fitz, and Percy. Cursed engagements or not. And how was she to know if it would be different with Rufus when she loved him more than she'd ever loved the others?

Elphi's heart raced as a growing sense of foreboding crashed through her in nauseating waves, making her bottom lip wobble and tears sting her eyes.

The walls seemed to be caving in on her, starving her of air, so she walked as fast as decency allowed without breaking into a run, paused only when she reached the landing, and took a deep, trembling breath.

"Hello ashore," Reggie called out with a silly grin bending his lips as he exited the carriage and walked to her. "We'd started to think you decided not to join us."

"Forgive me," Elphi stammered, her gaze darting between Reggie on the sidewalk and Rosalind still in the carriage, staring back at Elphi with an apologetic and disgruntled expression twisting her features. "I didn't mean to keep you waiting."

The note she'd received this morning hadn't mentioned he would be joining them, had it? No, she was sure it was only meant to be her and Rosalind visiting Madame Morrissey's shop.

Did he intend to spend the entire afternoon at the dressmakers with them? The thought caused her unease to soar.

She needed time to think and possibly talk to Rosalind about delicate matters, which would be difficult to do with Reggie along.

"No harm done." He smiled and offered the crook of his elbow, lowering his voice to a conspiratorial whisper as he escorted her toward the carriage at a snail's pace. "Though I should warn you, Rosalind is not very agreeable today. My fault, I'm afraid, not yours—I insisted on accompanying the two of you and soured her mood. So if she seems a bit waspish, don't take it personally."