Life of a Little Sister 3

Introduction

Yes, okay? I stopped talking to those assholes. I went from low contact to no contact 2 years ago. Even Joey. Anytime I spoke to him I was being spied on by everyone else, and ambushed into conversations I didn't want to have. Lexi is still dating Melvin, or not, I'm not sure. I had to cut her off too. My best friend's loyalty eventually started leaning towards Melvin, things I would tell her would start getting back to the whole family so she couldn't be trusted either. It just became easier not to talk to anyone from that part of my life.

I am 22 years old, living with a couple of roommates in a shoebox in Manhattan. The Tonelli name means nothing to the people around me and I am over the moon about it. I work as a waitress 5 nights a week at an upscale restaurant, and by taking home leftovers and messed up orders and decent tips I manage to survive. That and scholarships have kept me afloat.

My roommates are Anita and Bernice, and we get along well, even better that our rent is controlled and so low compared to other students we know. We are all the same age, and have lived together for four years now because we don't want to mess up our rent situation. That and we have grown to love each other like family. Our landlord lives in the building and has become like an uncle. A non creepy uncle whose wife brings us lasagnas once a month and tries to coerce us into attending mass even though neither of the girls are catholic.

I have no time for romance in my life. Sure I had a fling or two here and there but now work too much to have time for someone. I am looking forward to graduating and being able to focus on myself and what (or who) makes me happy.

I plan to take a gap year and travel, maybe go back home and visit my mom at some point. I've been working private parties and weekends for a while now to save up enough, and like the squirrel I am I have a sizeable savings waiting to be used.

I really don't want to talk about my family, but I guess that's why you're here.

Senior year college application time had rolled around, I had hidden pamphlets for colleges in New York and one day Felix found them. He was livid, leaving home wasn't an option in his mind, in his mind encouraging me to focus on my studies were just to go to the local state college and commute. My Father and Felix for once were on the same page and both thought it was WILD to consider going away for college.

Any child of immigrant can tell you turning 18 means nothing in your parents eyes, you don't suddenly gain freedom. State college and commute would be nice for someone who could stand living at home, but for me, I knew the only way I could gain freedom was leaving the house. I stopped arguing but continued doing the work and applying for grants and scholarships and making moves to become financially independent.

I was on full lockdown until the day came for my first semester and I left. I only visited on holidays, grudgingly, didn't let Mama help me move in, and I didn't tell anyone where I was staying. I didn't want anyone to know where I was so they couldn't drag me back home or get people to keep an eye on me.

I wanted my freedom and I took it.

2 years ago I went fully no contact with all except Mama on occasion. I don't want to go into detail but I did it and I don't regret it.

Sometimes I feel like it might be nice to reconnect as adults but every bone in my body tells me it would be a mistake and that before we reconnect I need to establish myself and my boundaries. To do that I would need to talk to a therapist. And have money for a therapist. But I would rather spend that money on a vacation and get my advice from TikTok therapists and the free counseling offered at school.

For now I am happy living in hiding, going by my middle name, and generally laying low.

I don't know what I would do if they found me. Hopefully I won't have to find out.