Call me crazy, but i am one of those few who don’t like holding hands. I like watching people who hold hands.
For me,holding hands is something too intimate.As if holding hands might give away my darkest fears and deepest secrets. But then I watch people holding hands,as if their hands are not just clasped but woven together.As if their hands were made to fit into each others’ and stay there. As if their fingertips were joint so closely that their blood now flowed through each other ,into each other.As if they are not two individuals but two wholes of a full.They don’t hold hands to show people that they are together.But to tell each other that their hand belongs to the other,if not forever,but till their hearts beat in perfect symphony matching the rhythm of their unspoken words.
Watching them reminds me why i don’t like holding hands.It reminds me that i can never get myself into something like that.Because I am too much of a coward to let my guard down.Too rapacious to be able to let them go if i ever let them in.I’d rather live in the safe haven of my dark paradise where emotions have no place than going out into the wild and watch myself burn in the fire of a delirious feeling .
