Why Why Why

Chapter 4

My mum comes charging into my room.

"Wake up you failure," she says.

Waking up I see her leaning over me with a whip ready to strike me. She aggressively pulls me out of bed and starts beating me. I scream out in pain.

"STOP PLEASE," I yell.

"Why would I? Seeing you in pain is fun," she says cackling.

I cry hysterically whilst screaming in pain. She starts kicking me in the head. I wrap my arms over my head. She grabbed my arms and legs and tied them up to my bed.

"Shut up, you're so annoying and useless," she says slapping my head.

She starts whipping me on my back and thighs. The pain is unbearable, and everything goes black.

I wake up in tears. My hands are trembling in fear. I look at the time, 4:30 am. Why does this world hate me? I get up and go to the bathroom. The voices in my head start talking again and I grab my blade to shut them up.

Useless

Cut

Worthless

Cut

Failure

Cut

Burden

Cut

Waste of space

Cut

I look at my arm which is covered in cuts. The numbness overtakes me as the intrusive thoughts start. I walk back to bed the time now being 5:15 am. Tiredness washes over me and I fall asleep again.

'BRINGGGGG'

My alarm sounds, and I instantly sit up. I sigh a breath of relieve as there is no danger around. Getting ready for school I tip toe down the stairs. Looking outside I see my mum's car still in the driveway. Panicking I look around and see her sitting at the dining table staring at me.

"Come here you little shit," she says aggressively.

I nervously walk over my eyes looking at the floor. She smacks my face, but I don't feel the pain.

"Where the hell are you going missy?" She asks.

"Umm, I-i was going to school," I say stuttering.

She hits my head with one of the beer bottles on the table.

"Speak properly and stop stuttering," she says angrily slamming the bottle back down on the table.

I flinch at the noise. She stands up and grabs my shirt.

"Look who's scared," she mocks me.

She pushes me into the table and as I fall she kicks my rib hard. I hiss in pain collapsing on the floor.

"Get your ass up and get to school," She says as she kicks me hard in the rib again one more time and leaves the room.

Shakily I get up the pain from my rib aching even more. I run out of the house as fast as I can to the train station. The train arrives just as I get there. I board the train and see its packed. My anxiety sky rockets as I struggle to breathe. The train stops suddenly, and someone bumps into my rib causing me to hiss. They just look at me weirdly and leave. Seeing a free seat, I look at the floor as I walk there so no-one sees the bruise on my head. Finally the train stops at my stop. I get off the train and walk to a public bathroom. Looking around I see no-one in here. Sitting down on the toilet, I let out a shaky breath. 10 minutes goes past and I am able to gather my thoughts and head to school.