Edi: Tell green about the birds and the bees
Oscar: they're disappearing at an alarming rate
—--------------‐----------------
*Everyone is standing around the broken coffee maker*
Minty : So. Who broke it? I'm not mad, I just wanna know.
Everyone:
Oscar : ...I did. I broke it.
Minty: No. No you didn't green?
Green : Don't look at me. Look at Tire.
Tire: What?! I didn't break it.
Green : Huh, that's weird. How'd you even know it was broken?
Tire: Because it's sitting right in front of us and it's broken.
Green : Suspicious.
Tire: No, it's not!
Edi : If it matters, probably not, but Colie was the last one to use it.
Colie: Liar! I don't even drink that crap!
Edi : Oh really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?
Colie: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows that, Edi!
Oscar : Okay let's not fight. I broke it. Let me pay for it, minty .
Minty : No! Who broke it!?
Everyone:
Edi : minty ... Green 's been awfully quiet.
Green : rEALLY?!
*Everyone starts arguing*
Minty , being interviewed: I broke it. I burned my hand so I punched it.
Minty : I predict 10 minutes from now they'll be at each other's throats with warpaint on their faces and a pig head on a stick.
Minty:
Minty: Good. It was getting a little chummy around here.
--------------------------------
Edi : *Posts a super low-quality image to the group chat*
Oscar : If I had a dollar for every pixel in this image, I’d have 15 cents
Edi : If I had a dollar for every ounce of rage I felt in my body after I read this text, I would have enough money to buy a cannon to fire at you
Green : Actually I did the math, Oscar would have $225, not $0.15.
Oscar : Fam I’m right here....
Tire: If I had a dollar I would buy a can of soda :)
Edi : while you’re there could you buy me an apply juice please?
Tire: Sorry I only have a dollar
Edi : :(
Green : Hey I just realized my friend is right, Oscar would have $22,500 because it's a dollar for every pixel, not a cent
Tire: If I had $22,500 I would buy a can of soda and an apply juice
Green : You can buy anything you want with $22,500
Minty : Yeah and they want soda and apply juice
Green : Apply juice to what
Colie: Directly to the forehead
Oscar : Great chat everyone
--------------------------------
Edi , walking into their house: Hello, people who do not live here.
Oscar : Hey.
Green : Hi.
Tire: Hello.
Minty : Hey!
Edi : I gave you the key to my place for emergencies only!
Colie: We were out of Doritos.
--------------------------------
Addi: This is such a bad idea.
ItsAdenthrwierdo : Then why are you coming along?
Addi: One of us need to be able to talk the cops out of arresting us when this inevitably goes wrong.
