They only care when you're gone...

The bathroom(3)

TW: there are mentions to cvtting, blood, and intrusive thoughts

"see you at lunch Flora!" Marie said to me while running to her next class I decide to skip class because like I've said before i hate gym class so i just go to the bathroom and go in the stall farthest from the door its not like ill get caught though the teacher could give less of a fuck if a kid isn't in class i brought my hand bag with me because it had my drawing stuff, my phone, my earbuds, makeup, etc. I take out my drawing stuff while sitting on my jacket i had put on the floor i continued working on the drawing from history class when i heard some other girls walk into the bathroom. From what i could hear it was about 3 maybe 4 girls i stopped what i was doing and listened to what they were talking about

"omg did you see what she was wearing! What kind of fashion is that like its so weird" one of the girls said while laughing with the others 'who are they talking about?' I asked myself " i know right! What's her name again?" one of the girls asked "i think it's 'Flora' or something so weird" one of the girls answered while laughing again 'they're........they're talking about me....?' i thought to myself while tearing up "I doubt she's even a real girl like have you seen her up close, I bet she's one of those tr@nnys." she said laughing a bit louder its like they knew i was in there and i soon started quietly sobbing, and because of my dad I've mastered the art of making no noise when crying, and then the intrusive thoughts started kicking in 

TW starts now

'you dont look like a real girl' 'no one likes you' 'everyone hates you' 'everyone thinks you look like a guy' 'Marie is only friends with you because she pities you' 'Marie only talks to you when no one else will' 

I started to break the girls had already left but the intrusive thoughts kept going on and on until i broke, and i got my blade out of my bag and i took off my gloves and....started cvtting. over and over not stopping until my arm was raw and felt like static. when i snapped out of it and saw what i did i panicked blood was all over my arm 

i quickly got some toilet paper and cleaned the blood, when i finished cleaning the blood up i put the tissue into the toilet. I grabbed the bandages out of my bag and started wrapping my arm with it.

TW ends now

i walked out of the bathroom a little after the bell rang after finishing cleaning myself up. my nerves were still a bit fucked up but it wasn't to bad

i met back up with Marie for lunch hopeing that id there is any holy or unholy god out there that she didnt notice the bandage...