CHAPTER SIXTEEN
sleep on the floor
Everything felt different, upon their return.
Rosalie hated it. The family had barely spoken in the day that followed Bella's discharge from the hospital. Whether it was out of fear of upsetting Edward or causing an argument, she didn't know, but Rose didn't stay long enough within the glassy walls of their home, to find out. She avoided Bella as if she held the plague, too afraid to say something wrong, because though even the air felt stale now they'd returned, a calmness had settled upon the town, upon Rosalie. A tranquillity she refused to disrupt.
Edward finally found her by the stream. He had been looking for her and rose had avoided him, though she'd made a poor job of it. It was always there by the riverbank, knees digging into the rocky sand and hands submerged, that he found her. She remembered the last time they had spoken beneath the cover of the trees. It seemed so long ago and so much had happened since just as she had warned and predicted. In spite of it, she could not feel angry. Rosalie was too tired for that.
You're playing a dangerous game, Edward, she'd warned him. The game had been played and he had won in the end. But at what cost? She pushed the thought away and let him come closer, sitting by her side.
"I think you're owed a thanks," Edward said. "For helping me. For helping Bella. I didn't think you would."
"Neither did I," she breathed, surprising him with her honesty.
"What made you?"
Rose shook her head. "You'll think me selfish."
"I already do," Edward said, his tone lacking malice, rewarding her with the same truthfulness she'd given.
Rosalie let out a sigh and folded her arms across her knees. "I thought of Violet Green." She thought of Violet Green and felt fear and resentment and understanding, all wrapped in one. "I would have been a hypocrite to think of Violet and to still stand there and watch. And I'm many things-"
"Yes you are," Edward interrupted, but there was a fondness in his voice and he was smiling gently.
"I'm many things, but I'm not a hypocrite," Rose finished, leaning her chin against her arms as she watched the ripples of the water. It made her want to close her eyes, craving the human feeling of a calm sleep. "And Bella deserves to live the life we couldn't."
A flash of guilt crossed Edward's face but it left as quickly as it had appeared. He placed a hand against her elbow and Rose moved to grasp his hand in hers. Her smile was weak but he returned it. It was funny to think that once he'd been destined to be her partner. All she could feel for him was familial love. The unique type of love that often bordered hate.
Your life isn't what you wanted, Rosalie, but can't we try to get a happy five years?
"I didn't think it would be too much to ask. To keep our home safe.
"You don't get to decide who you love," he said as if that answered enough. She supposed it was. It was love that had led them down this pathway.
Not long ago she would have argued. There's always a choice. You didn't choose me. But she wasn't so sure anymore.
"I can't lose this, Edward," Rosalie whispered, gripping his hand tighter. "You have to promise me that we'll stay here for as long as we can. That this will stay our home until it can't be for any longer."
"Rose..."
She couldn't let him refuse. "This was the first place that felt like a home after - after..." Rosalie drifted off, shaking her head. His hand held hers just as tightly. "I'm not ready to leave."
