When Paths Collide

Chapter 4 - The Syndulla's

Alema Syndulla

"I am not ready for this," I state breathlessly. Nervousness is crawling under my skin. I can't believe I'm doing this. I haven't been to Ryloth since I left. Ahsoka and Anakin and Obi-Wan were the ones who got the glory of fighting that battle, or I would've reunited with my family then. I don't even know how many are still alive.

"We can do it," Ahsoka reassures.

"Can I?"

"You've fought through hundreds of thousands of droids, dealt with a maniac of a master, lost a limb, destroyed tanks single-handedly at thirteen, and you're afraid to meet these people?"

"My father is a legendary hero of our planet, okay? He's a well-known hero and I don't remember him, and I haven't seen him since I was three, and I don't even know the names of my family and I don't know if I have any siblings or if they'll be glad I came back. They sent me to become a Jedi, remember?!" I blurt out in a rush, words coming out in a jumble I can only hope she understands. At least it gets the idea across. "What if they're mad I left?"

"Then we'll go to Shili," Ahsoka replies, not as if it helps. I'm afraid of being rejected, though I can't imagine why I would be.

"And what if they worship me?" I continue, "What are they like? I don't know anything about the culture here, anymore! What if we're too different to fit in? What if the war comes here again?"

"Then at least we're here to protect them?" Ahsoka offers. "But you're catastrophizing. Just breathe. We'll be fine, and I'm right here. Honestly, what worse could happen that hasn't already?"

She has a point. "I don't know them," I continue. "I was already thrown out of one family. I don't want that to happen again!"

My sister sets a hand on my arm. "We'll go through that together, too. That's what we'll do. They'd be foolish not to want you."

It does little to calm my nerves, but I take a few deep breaths, attempting to expel my anxiety into the Force. After all, even if I am no longer a Jedi, I know no other way. The beliefs never failed me once, even if the people did. (I miss the twins. They're the only parents I knew, the only place I can call 'home'. They're the only true family we had – because family stays together through to the end – but it feels unfair for us to settle down when they can't.)

We send a message ahead that we're coming, because that's the only way we'll be allowed into the Syndulla residence in the first place. Considering that this is a time of war, that's not really a surprise. I'm glad anyway, because that's going to make it easier. At least I won't have to literally knock on the door and then try to explain from there who we are.

That hardly makes me feel any less nervous now, though, that Ahsoka and I are standing right outside the place. My heart is hammering wildly, and I don't think I've been this nervous since... Never, actually.

We're waiting out in the courtyard when two familiar figures finally stride into view. My memories of them might be so faint I couldn't picture them anymore, but I still know who they are instantly. Cham and Eleni. My parents.

It's weird to think of that title towards someone now, after so many years.

For a moment, all I can do is stand and... stare. What am I supposed to say? Both of them appear momentarily at a loss for words as well. Good. It's relieving to know I'm not the only person who has no idea how to react.

"Alema?" my mother finally utters.

"Mother," I breathe, a surge of emotions rushing through me. I hardly know her, but... I may have hardly remembered anything, but now that I'm here again, in the very place I spent the first few years of my life, I realize that there was a part of me that still missed this. I still care for my family here, even if I don't know them anymore.