Match Made in Wedding | Rajvardhan Hangargekar ✓

Fading Mehendi

The sun rose with urgency, as if it was aware of what lay ahead in the day. The morning could have fooled anyone, for the sun shone with strength, painting the sky yellow. It had become a part of the entourage and knew that two important ceremonies were to take place today - The Mehendi in the morning, and the Sangeet in the evening. It spread its warm rays to the Gaikwad's ancestral home, becoming a spectator in anticipation.

*******

Rajvardhan

I watch the ladies as they settle down in the angan to get their hands decorated with mehendi. One girl in an olive green lehenga caught my eyes, as usual. While she looked down at the design that was slowly taking form on her hands, I allowed myself to look at her without restraint. Perhaps, fate sensed my yearning and let the locks of her hair cover her face.

I sigh in agony.

During these two days, my belief in my feelings for her has strengthened. And I have resigned to the fact that Devika Pillai has enchanted me. Right from the childlike but not childish expressions to the spontaneous spirit, she has unknowingly  taught me to live in the moment. Even when it can cost you a heart break.

My desire to have a look at her face from near overpowers me and I make my way towards the girl who's sitting closest to her, Shanelle. Upon noticing my arrival, she beams at me and says,

"Raj, look, isn't the design so pretty!" I take her hand in mine and pretend to have a look while hiding behind it to steal a glance of Devi's face. She looks tired, yet...

"Beautiful." I say with my mind on Devi. It could be my overthinking powers but I feel Devi stiffen. Eager to stay near her as long as I can, I ask Shanelle if she would like to have some water. When she nods in positive, I head towards the kitchen only to see Jaddu bhai opening a bottle of Maaza.

"Baakiyon ka toh pata nahi but maine suna hai Devi ko Maaza bahot pasand hai."

Moved by the affection he has for Devi, I am rendered speechless. What can one even say when one is torn between acting and actuality.

With one glass of Maaza and one glass of Sprite for his wife, Jaddu slides out of the kitchen.

There's a constant movement in the kitchen. Mostly, men are found filling or refilling glasses of water or searching for dry snacks to feed the women as they get their hands painted. Since most of them want an elaborate elbow to the tip of finger designs, it takes longer.

When I return, I notice that the unexpected warmth of today's sun makes Devi perspire. With the front of her hand wet with design she struggles to wipe it off. My hands itch to touch her.

I search for Jaddu, hoping that he'd be around to wipe it off. Seeing him kneeling in front of his wife with fondness, I sigh. Just as I am about to reach her she makes use of her elbow to wipe it off. I snap my hand back into its place before she notices it.

Her self sufficient nature makes me smile. She could have asked for help from the lady applying the mehendi but when has Devi needed anyone?

I try to shake the bitterness from thought away by reminding myself that her free spiritedness was what had made me fall for herself in the first place. The confidence and the assuredness that oozed out of her had drawn me to her.

She seemed to be so secure, unlike me who constantly wavered and doubted. She was too good for me.

Lost in my thoughts as I was, I did not realise when her Mehendi got done. When she passed by me I was hit by a familiar fragrance of lilies. Shaking my head, I cut through the fragrance without an inhale.

******

Devika

I did not get enough sleep last night. Constant oscillation of thoughts manifested itself physically, leaving me tossing and turning throughout the night. The reasons why I had denied my feelings for Raj were becoming heavy and binding instead of freeing.

When I dress for the Mehendi ceremony, I have a look at myself in the mirror. It seems as if all my liveliness has been drained out of me. Suddenly I realise that it wasn't the silence of the night that had been haunting me yesterday but Raj's silence.

If only there were a way to postpone feelings.

We all have a certain dream for a certain number of events. Just like we have some desires for our wedding, we harbour aspirations for our sibling's wedding too. Being the younger one, I had imagined that I would be seriously involved in Akka's wedding without distractions. I wanted to devote myself to give her a perfect wedding.

But destiny doesn't like perfection.

When I would find myself caught up in the thoughts of a certain guy with an angelic smile while doing an assigned job, I would be irritated. Raj had begun occupying a chamber of my heart. And the timing couldn't be more unfortunate.

I made mistakes. I erred. I got carried away. Enraptured by his voice, I even slipped. Two days back when he was trying to confess his feelings for me, I lashed out all the frustration that had been building up since the D mart visit.

During these important days of my sister's life, I did not want to be caught up in a romance.

After all, I won't have her with me once the way I did, once she's gone.

Shaking all thoughts of doubt away, I focus my attention on my mehendi design.

It looks...

"Beautiful." I hear Raj's voice. It is close. He is close. All my resolve seems to break away as I feel myself wanting to have a look at him. Through the corner of my eyes I see him holding Shanelle's hand. My body stiffens.

In these days I had realised one thing. Raj was an independent soul. Almost like a river. He flowed in different directions, seeking diverse things. With his strong build he was likely to be stereotyped as someone who was practical. And as he projected on his social media, someone who did not give a damn.

But I knew that he was one of the most sentimental boys I knew.

And I had hurt him.

Almost as if on cue, the sun starts shining brighter, leaving my prone to perspire skin, sweating. With mehendi adorning my front and back hand, I struggle a little to wipe it.

In the end I manage to help myself. It was an essential but unwanted reminder of how neither siblings stay nor romances.

I thank the mehendi waali didi and get up, passing Raj in the route.

Despite the rich colour that will be reflected on every hand, it's important to remember that just like Mehendi, everything fades.