the shire is burning [eddie munson x OC]

chapter thirty six

"You've ever been in a room and knew someone else was everybody else's favorite person, but you knew that you were that person's favorite? It made it a bit more bearable."

Eddie knew that feeling all too well.

"Like, it's fine, because the person shining the brightest thinks you shine just as brightly."

He felt it every time Willow Jenkins looked at him.

Willow had fallen asleep a while ago. But sleep was avoiding Eddie, depriving him of his own sweet relaxation like the one that spreads over her face. He tries to not toss and turn too much in the bed beside her, a predicament that she had insisted upon and he had been too soft for her to fight it.

Too soft . That was putting it lightly. He was crushed velvet for the girl resting peacefully at his side, complete putty in her hands. And he's convinced that she has no idea of her effect on him. She has no idea of the power she holds over him.

"Willow, I lo-"

He had almost told her. He had almost confessed to her, laid his cards out on the table and admitted the absolute chokehold she had on his emotions. He had been convinced that the last month of casual touches, fleeting kisses, and heavy play-pretend would diminish the feelings growing for her in his chest. But it had only watered the garden - a garden in which a flower bloomed every time she smiled at him, in which the vines had a death grip on his lungs every time she entered the room. It was beautiful, it was suffocating, it was all-consuming.

But it wasn't the right time. Not with all the heavy emotions in the air. He doesn't think there's ever going to be a perfect time to admit his catastrophic feelings for her, but he knows it isn't tonight. Not after all that she's admitted to him, not after she's taken her trust in one hand and her heart in the other and handed both over to him without hesitation.

He's angry. Not at her, but for her. He's angry at a Universe that could ever bring such tragedy into the life of the golden girl beside him. She deserves so much more , more than he could ever put into words. And he knows for a fact that she didn't deserve that. Nobody deserves that .

If given the chance, he doesn't know who he would swing his fists in the direction of first; her brother, who had unfairly become consumed by unfavorably addictions out of his control? Her brother's dealer, who had pushed far too much responsibility off onto a child ? Her father, who had unfairly blamed his remaining child for a situation out of her control?

Eddie doesn't know. All he knows is that his knuckles ache from how tightly he's held the fists at his side.

He had once told her that she was his 'guard dog', that essentially she was his protector, and everyone had agreed. She had lived up to the status this last month, staying fiercely by his side and sending looks to kill towards anyone who so much as even thought about being crude or snide towards Eddie. He watched her grow from a measly wallflower to a fire being breathed into her, the confidence to command a room right at her fingertips. The cheerleaders knew better, the jocks knew better, Jason fucking Carver knew better. She hadn't even had to spill blood to prove her point to the rest of the school - everyone knew better than to mess with Eddie now that he had someone willing to fight for him. And Willow would fight for him, bravely so, even if he wasn't sure if she'd ever even thrown a punch in her life. He's pretty sure the closest she's gotten to a physical altercation had been the day she'd thrown Jason's shoulder out with her backpack.

Rumor had it that his shoulder was still sore and tender. Even if it wasn't true, Eddie didn't want to ever be on the receiving end of that kind of anger from Willow.