Lakehouse

Chapter Nineteen

I'm starting to get bored.

I know that in a situation like this, boredom should be the last thing on my mind, but I can't help myself. We've been sitting here for hours-maybe days, who knows-doing completely nothing. The hunger and thirst is starting to get to me finally, sending sharp pains into my stomach and making me feel lightheaded. Again, I wonder how Levi has survived as long as he has when I can barely manage for a fraction of what he's been through.

I suppose I've had a lot of time to think. Overthink, to be more exact. I've contemplated the concept of time. If life is all just one hallucination that my brain is making up. If it's possible to somehow choose to make my heart stop beating. If there's actually a heaven that I'll rise up to after I die. If singing Nirvana songs will help me feel better like it does for Levi.

I'm so lonely, but that's okay, I shaved my head...

'Lithium' has always been his favorite song.

And just maybe I'm to blame for all I've heard, but I'm not sure...

I don't think I can pick a favorite. I like them all.

I'm so excited, I can't wait to meet you there, but I don't care...

"Sadie?"

I look across the room and see Levi lying on the floor, running his fingers through his mane of hair. His fingers are shaded a light pink-probably from all the matted blood in his locks. "Yeah?" I ask.

"Can you tell me more about Julia?" He looks at his fingers, starting to pick dirt and blood from beneath his fingernails. "I'm starting to forget what she looks like... and sounds like and feels like. It's starting to eat at me."

I blink. "Okay," I say, and then pause. "Julia. Tall, skinny, beautiful. Jet black hair and green eyes that I've always been jealous of. Constantly wearing red lipstick that I often see on your neck." He chuckles at that, and I just smile and shake my head. "Her voice is low. She's really good at singing-I think she should go into the music industry, or something. But she does laugh like a hyena, which I think is kind of scary sometimes, but you think it's cute. So then I think it's cute because your relationship is so cute." He laughs again. "I don't really know what she feels like. I've only hugged her a few times and if I knew an in-depth answer to that, it would probably be creepy. But you always say she smells like honey. I guess that's up to you."

She also didn't look for you, I think. Not like I did.

Levi takes a deep breath, letting his hand fall from his hair and onto the ground, the shackles clattering as he does so. "I miss her just as much as I missed you, which is a lot. I think that pain is worse than anything they could do to me. Just missing the people I love."

I nod in agreement. I mean, there aren't that many people left out there that I really care about-just Lou and O'Brien, Delia, and Theo, but I do miss them more than I can comprehend. Especially since I'm not sure what Felix and Ry have done to Theo and Cara; I don't even know if they're still alive, or why they're in the mess to begin with.