Dusk 'Til Dawn (Ziam)

Liam's POV

LIAM'S POV

Well, I talked to Zayn after lunch today. We talked for the entire class period about books. It turns out he's really nice.

Laying on my bed, staring at the ceiling, contemplating everything, my mum knocks on the door. "Li, honey, how was your first day of school?"

"Good, mum," I say, sitting up. "I actually made some friends. Do you remember Louis?" She nods her head. "He's in a bunch of my classes now and I've been getting on really well with his friend group!"

"Awe, baby, that's wonderful! I'm gonna make some dinner, is there anything you want?" She puts a hand on my cheek.

"Uh, potato soup sounds good? Can you put some beef in it? My friend, Niall, said it's good and I wanted to try it."

She smiles softly. "It sounds disgusting, but anything for you, hon."

"I love you, mummy," I say, kissing her cheek. I know its stupid for me to call my mum "mummy" but I love her. It makes me sound like a mama's boy, but what's so bad about loving your mom?

"We're going to church after we eat, so wear something nice." She kisses my forehead and leaves the room.

My family is super religious. I don't really curse, I've never had sex, I go to church on Wednesdays and Sundays... and we don't support homosexuality. That's why I'm straight. I think that, if I wasn't religious, maybe I would be open to dating guys, but I want to make my family proud. My dad left when I was young because he thought I was "queer", but I promised my mom I'm not. I don't think she really believes me though. I've never had a girlfriend, I just don't find myself attracted to girls. Not as much as I find guys attractive. What am I saying? I sound gay. I'm not gay. Straight as a ruler, remember?

We ate the soup, it was delicious, and then we went to church. Today, they're talking about... homosexuality. Why is this coming up so much lately?

I don't say a word for the rest of the night. I can tell my mom is getting curious though. She keeps looking at me. Staring, more like. To be honest, it's kind of freaking me out.

"I'm going to bed," I mumble at about eight thirty.

"Liam, talk to me," she pleads.

"What do you want me to say, mom?" I can't help it. I'm snapping.

"Why aren't you talking to me?"

"GAY PEOPLE ARE STILL PEOPLE, MOM!" I yell. I don't mean to yell, but I can't keep it in.

"You better watch your tone when you speak to me, young man."

"I'm sorry, but everybody at our church acts as though they shouldn't exist and that it's wrong. I don't think it's wrong."

"Hon, is this your way of telling me something?" My mum gives me a soft look.

"I don't know, mum." Tears start forming in my eyes. "Can I just please go to bed?" My mum hesitates before nodding softly.

I don't know what's gotten into me. Upon reaching my room, I stuff my face into my pillow and cry. I cry until I fall asleep. I've had an epitome. I think... I think I'm gay. And I think I have a crush on Zayn Malik.