#offtopic | Dreamscapes Multi-verse

Photo Book part 2 (Shogo AU)

Shogo has never been one for homework, he was sure of that of his old self. He wondered if his fellow spirits avoided this realm strictly because of these odd human schedules. The paper before him was blank, but it was already decided he would leave it like that.

He imagined once again about what his mother thought of him. Was he blending in, was it too obvious of a disguise? Fighting for existence everyday, his muscles and bodies were toned and honed from his countless battles in the spirit realm but for control of his mental state? That was a learned patience; a war of attrition in the middle of Spring. The act of waking up and not wanting to let the old Shogo go, despite being Shogo. A year of physical therapy and a lot more training than Shogo actually needed helped his control over his body much more.

She wasn't ready to lose her son that day the car accident happened, twice. And now everyday, a spitting reminder of her loss stands before her living and breathing.

I am an imposter wearing the person I killed's skin.

It's probably what she thinks. Truth is, without him, the old Shogo would have died. Shogo didn't know if he himself resented the past Shogo and his old ambitions, but he was sure it isn't easy letting go. It was not like he could trust her and furthermore, not like she would believe him. It also wasn't like he could just chew his hand off and slither out of his wrist into a new body. This was his chance of being a new, transcended form, but also one who would respect the dead. So when he heard that fateful sound, the call, he was nervous.

"Shogo, come here," his mother's voice came through the other side of his door, like an incorporeal body of light and complicated feelings instead of just sound. It was time to face them, whatever they were.

He popped his head out his open door and his mother immediately noticed. She always had a weary look on her face whenever she glanced at him. She was sitting at the table. On it was a pair of bins. In her lap was a binder, what did humans call them...?

A photo book with many photos and memories she hoped he could remember.

"This is..." he viewed the small photos.

"I had the chance to grab these from your father's place," she explained. "I- I figured you might want to see a little about yourself."

Shogo didn't bring up the horrible thing he asked her that night last week. She could do without the memory. After flipping through a few of them in silence, Shogo wondered what she hoped to accomplish. He felt nothing for these photos of his past self.

They were... happy. He was smiling in each one, seemingly more vibran and full of energy.

"Do you miss him?" Shogo asked her. "I'm sorry for springing that on you again."

"Yes," she tells Shogo.

"Tell me about him," Shogo suggested. "It's ok to mourn the loved ones you lose, even if they had flaws. You don't have to tell me everything if you don't want to, but please get some rest on it. You've gone through a lot."

"You used to be so energetic," she laughs quietly to herself. "Honestly, it was tough keeping up after you. For your father, too. Both of us loved you very much."

"Even after I totaled your car?"

"We were worried sick for you," mother said. She probably missed the car more than him. "Your father, even today, still has nightmares over what you put yourself through. Countless nights in the hospital, not certain that you'd come back or not."

But I didn't come back, Shogo thought but he just nodded instead.

"Now what?"

"I didn't mean I hate the new you," she said, trying to process the right things to say. "Taking care of you took a year. I resigned myself to having to do that for the rest of my life. You have his laugh, his smile... but you're not him. At least not yet, or something. I'm sorry I got mad at you, after all."

She smiles, as fake as the curtains in this house.

"You're my son, no matter what!"