I wasn't Hatred I Felt // Jamilton

Chapter 5

TW MENTIONS OF ATTEMPTED SUICIDE

"Are we going to talk about yesterday?"

"I would any other day, but today's not any other day." Hamilton said, his eyes steady towards his desktop. "Could we just forget about it?"

"I'm willing."

There was a clear silence before a hand went on Hamilton's shoulder. He flinched before looking back.

"You're working on somethin'?" Jefferson asked, a slight southerner accent breaking through.

"Mhm."

"What is it?"

"Plan for a novel."

Jefferson looked closer, seeing the name Amory.

"What's it about?" He asked.

"You'd be excellent at 20 questions," Hamilton said with a sigh. "It's about a young, fostered girl named Amory. She lost her parents within a fire, her being the only one who escaped the flames. Ever since the incident, voices continued to utter things into her ears, persuading her to try and… well, kill herself. No matter how hard she'd try, she wouldn't die."

"…"

"And?"

Hamilton had a look of utter confusion plastered across his face.

"What do you mean 'and'?"

"Well you can't just leave it off there! What happens next?" Jefferson asked.

Hamilton sighed. "I don't have a proper ending, if I'm being honest. I believe it may continue with her falling in love with a boy. He makes all her problems seem miniscule whenever he's around. She's almost hypnotized by the boy. With this, I'm almost sure it ends in a request from the man for her to kill herself by jumping off a building. She does such, and ends up killing herself."

He was met with silence.

"What?"

Silence met him once again before words came from Jefferson's mouth.

"I'm sorry. It's just that you talk so beautifully."

Hamilton turned red with this.

"It feels like you're reciting a rhythmic poem simply from memorization. No matter what you say, no matter how disrespectful, inappropriate, or crude, it always feels so gentle."

Hamilton was speechless at that.

"Again, I'm sorry, but… can I kiss you?"

Before a proper answer could be inferred, Jefferson came not even an inch away from Hamilton's lips.

It happened. Their lips touched as they gently kissed. It wasn't aggressive in even the slightest. It was only comforting.

Suddenly, Hamilton's phone vibrated.

He jumped up quickly, removing himself from their kiss. He practically speed ran his way to log off his desktop. He threw off his reading glasses and grabbed his satchel as he ran to the door.

"Sorry, gotta go! Could you feed Quill for me? Thank you. See you tomorrow!" Hamilton said in a rush.

"See… you."

Hamilton left Jefferson speechless, his cheeks slowly rising into a sorrowful smile.

.      .      .

"Alex?! Why are you late this time?" Peggy asked, facepalming.

Hamilton panted, exhausted, his face pink. With this, Peggy's disappointment turned into a knowing smile.