Promise This Is Forever.

The fight

I didn't see Greyson for the rest of the weekend and not even in the second hour Monday in gym class. It didn't seem like him so I messaged and I called, I even asked his friends and no one had heard from him. The worrying starts to set in and that's what I do best. The worst things that could have happened run through my head like they are running a marathon. I cried four times that day and when I got home I cried even more alone, lost in my room. I didn't want to turn to books for comfort or daydreaming so I'd forget…I wanted to know where he was and if he was okay. 

I laid in my bed most of the night and thought about the kiss on my cheek and quietly said to myself what did I do wrong? I heard mom call my name and I went to see what she needed and she pulled me into her office to see how something looked on her since me and Alex knew about it, as for dad he didn't like it but he wasn't home half the time anyways anymore. My life was falling apart right in front of my eyes and all I wanted was to hear from him. That evening mom told me, dad, and Alex she had an interview for a real job. Alex and I kept Melody and dad of course left. I spent the whole night sleeping with Melody until I heard a car pull up the driveway, I rushed Melody up stairs to ALex and told them to stay put and then went and peeked through the window. It was our dad and another woman… I ran to my room and I heard the lady saying they needed to talk and then I heard them kissing. She stopped him and said there is something you need to know… you're the only man I've slept with since my divorce and I'm pregnant. Tears filled my eyes and I wanted to go out there and scream at them, instead I shut my door and texted Alex to stay in her room. 

The next morning mom woke me up and I told her I wasn't going and she tried fighting with me about it I felt bad for telling her to leave me alone but she did, she understood her limits. When she left my room I got up and locked my door and then grabbed the lighter from my dresser drawer and pulled my shorts down and let the hot flames burn my skin. I was numb to the feeling of it and really numb to everything going on right now. I was so out of it I didnt hear my window open. All I heard was him saying what the hell are you doing and grabbing the lighter from me. I pulled my shorts up and with tears in my eyes and my face burnt red I asked him why now he chooses to show up and he said he had gone out of town. That is complete bullshit and you know it stop lying to me. I yelled at him and what'd  he do,  yelled back, I don't owe you any explanation we are not dating. I didn't know what to say. My heart hurts and my legs feel weak. He had just broken me, then leave and don't come through my window again I said through tears. He must have realized what just happened because his eyes lit up and he said he was sorry but for me it was too late. He did leave and watching him walk away was painful.