With You

Chapter 5

"Obi-Wan Kenobi, if you're receiving this message, it's because my R4 unit hasn't received communication from me in a week. I've instructed it to send it to you on a priority signal, because if that is the case, it means something terrible has happened. In order for this message to continue, you'll need to provide our code phrase, at which time my R4 will continue the message..."

Obi-Wan gasped at the holoimage in front of him. It was Cecilia... Cecilia Quin. His hand reached out of it's own accord and met nothing. He cleared his throat, and couldn't help but smile as he recited the line. "I'm feeling like a bantha today," he said—finding himself choking over the words, however, as they brought back a rush of fond memories of the inside jokes he and Cecilia had come up with over the years. This one had somehow become their code phrase to let each other know they needed to talk—privately—about some matter or another.

Suddenly, the message continued playing. "...Well, If you've gotten this far... well even the thought that you remembered means a great deal to me... But I digress..."

He looked her over, and if possible she looked even more beautiful than she had before. Older, more mature, still in incredible shape, and it far more fitting clothes than Jedi robes. He watched as she paused, took a deep breath, and continued.

"I've been on Ninjawe 4 for weeks now, scouting out this slave ring. They take men, women.... And children, Obi-Wan... and the things they do to them are inexcusable. My hope is to find a way in and get them out.

I've got a bad feeling about this, Obi... but I can't sit by and watch more children end up in this camp. If even a few of them get free, if even a few slavers and their customers are stopped... then it is worth my life.

I know, after all these years, it's ridiculous of me to be contacting you. I've read about your great accomplishments and I'm sure you've forgotten about me. I—I'm not even necessarily asking for your help.

I just needed to finally say the words out loud that I have thought in my heart for ten years now. I just wanted you to know, Obi-Wan... I -need- you to know... I haven't forgotten about you. I know I've been gone a long time. I know you pushed me away and said you didn't need me anymore, and from what I've read and heard, you've become an incredible Jedi Master. So I guess it's true—I guess you didn't need me.

I just needed you to hear from me that your friendship always meant more to me than any other, and I've missed you so much over these years. As firm as you were in your hold of the Jedi Code and your loyalty to the Order. I can only imagine what you think of me. I hope that you might one day forgive me for walking away from the Jedi.

I've still followed the path... in my own way. I still follow the Force where it leads me. Just sometimes in ways that may seem... unconventional... to the Order.

I'm rambling, aren't I? I suppose so. I just— I couldn't walk into this without saying these last few words to you, Obi-Wan. Words I should have said all those years ago, before you left for Naboo and I began my trials. I love you, Obi-Wan. I always have... May the Force be with you.

Obi-Wan had barely heard the final words of the message before he was ordering his ship to the Ninjawe system. To say that Obi-Wan brought the full brunt of the Republic army that was at his disposal down upon Ninjawe 4 was an understatement. His official communication to the Republic and the Jedi Council, after he was already on his way, had been that a reliable source had given him information about a nasty slavery ring based on the planet. He didn't wait for their approval.

What he hadn't told them, was that his source was former Jedi Knight Cecilia Quin. The woman whom he'd known since his very earliest days in the creche at the Temple. The woman with whom she had shared a bond unlike any other he'd ever read or heard about within the Jedi. The woman who he had pushed away—the woman who had walked away from everything they had both been raised to fight for. He would do whatever it took to see to her safety—and to the tearing down of these slavers. He had so many mixed feelings about her leaving, about his own actions in the days before she left—but there was one feeling he had no confusion over. And he knew that no matter how dangerous, he knew—he knew that if it came down to a choice between her life and destroying the slavers—she would live to see another day.

And he knew what that meant. He knew what it meant to the vows he'd made to the Jedi Code. And for the first time in his entire life he allowed himself to fully accept the facts as he knew them. Attachments were forbidden. And he was very clearly attached to Cecilia Quin. He loved Cecilia Quin in the deepest most inner parts of his heart where the Force flowed within him.

He remembered the moment that Master Yoda had told him that Knight Quin had left the order. He'd held onto the guilt that it was his fault for all these years. He'd pushed her away when he needed her the most. And for years he'd felt the emptiness in his life where she belonged.

He'd heard various rumors about her at times—she'd become a "Grey Jedi". No longer following the Jedi Code in its entirety, still following the Force, but on her own. He wondered if she'd found others like her, as he knew there had been a few who at times had followed the same path. He wondered if perhaps she'd found someone else... but now... this message had given him the slightest glimmer of hope.

He was brought out of his thoughts as the ship landed on Ninjawe 4.