"she plays guitar?" wilbur soot x reader

lyrics

tw: sh reference, panic attack

Tom looks at me with a smile, but when I look over to Will, he seems slightly displeased. "What's up?" I ask. Will ignores my question, instead smiling at me and continuing to talk about the lyrics. "So, this line, I'm not sure if it applies to you. I want to make sure you're in love with everything about this song, especially since it's your first one."

"Hmm... not really? Tom, could you please go get me a coke from the local Tesco?" I say handing Tom a tenner, not waiting for a response. He groans in annoyance, but gets up. "Can or bottle?" he asks. "Hmm... get us three each a can and... could you grab me a sandwich?" I ask. "I'm getting the coke, that's it." he says.

He goes out the door and says "Could I buy Ash one as well?" I reply with a smile and nod. Tom laughs as he looks at Will, but when I look at Will, he seems normal. "What's so funny, child?" I ask looking back at Tom. "Fuck you." Tom says flipping me off and leaving.

"Sorry, needed an excuse to discuss the song." I say smiling at Will. "Clever. So, if not this line, what else?" he asks. I think of the best fucking line ever, but I know I can't say it.

"I cut you out my life just like you made me cut my own."

It rhymes with the previous and last lines. It matches with the previous line, talking about my father. Maybe I say it and he doesn't question it? What if he figures it out? Fuck it. YOLO! "What about... I cut you out my life just like you made me cut my own?" I look at Will.

"Why? I mean, the line is amazing, but could I ask the meaning? I realise the you refers to your father, but the rest?" He asks. "Well... umm... maybe another time?" I say. Will can sense my mood drop, so he leaves the question be, not pushing it. "Alright, what about this one?"

"Cut the cake or just my thigh."

I didn't like the line Will had, and this would fit perfectly as well, but god is it obvious. "I don't particularly like it. I feel like I'm being difficult, sorry." I say feeling a repressed memory fly back to the top of my mind.

"YOU JUST HAVE TO CHOOSE A FUCKING COLOUR. ITS LITERALLY ONLY YOUR BIRTHDAY, IT'S NOT IMPORTANT. I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHY YOUR BROTHER WANTS YOU TO, IT'S SO USELESS, JUST LIKE YOU!"

My whole body feels the exact same way it did when my mother screamed those words at me at age 9 or so. I feel small and useless, and extremely helpless. I can feel my heart start pounding extremely and my eyes are now shut with black fog.

Why now? Why in front of Will? Why in public? Why about this? Why like this?

I can hear muffled sounds, I'm assuming Will's talking. I can't focus on anything as I've curled up into a ball. I can feel a hand on my back, but in only a second it turns into needles. "FUCK OFF!" I yell, not knowing who was the one poking me with needles.

My whole body is too fast and too slow for my brain to follow, so I just sit there. I then hear another sound. A voice. This time, a very clear voice. I don't know who it belongs to, but it's calming me down. I don't recognise it at all, but I think I've heard it at least once before.

I can feel my heart rate calm down, but it might be getting too slow, because I feel myself pass out completely. I feel my head hit some kind of surface, I hear muffled shouting, but my eyes can see for a second. I see not Will, not Tom, not Ash, but Joe.

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sorry for the short chapter, i wanna start a new chapter here because it feels like a nice place to just kinda wrap it up.