Three Day Cafe

Episode 8. Demonic Seal of Approval

"Oni wants to call home first!" the dragon exclaimed cheerfully. She dialed a number her mom had forced her to memorize.

After three rings, a video screen popped up. A woman with hair the same shade of Oni's and eyes with purple pupils appeared. She had straight black horns on her head and black wings. The woman was distractedly looking to the side while cooking in a pan.

Sherbet greeted the woman, looking over Oni's shoulder. "Monstre! Look what I've found!"

Even up close, the dragon woman was at least three times bigger than even Oni's formidable size. "Sherbet, I'm telling you, we're fully booked. Why the sudden interest in employing us? I already told Teuful—"

Monstre looked at the screen and her eyes widened. The pan clattered onto the stovetop. "Oh my devil! Oni! Is that you?"

"Mom!!!" Oni exclaimed in delight.

"My little baby Oni! Thank the Nine Levels of Hell!" Monstre grabbed the phone with both hands. "I was so worried about you! You've been missing for a whole month! Are you okay?!"

"Oni is fine! Oni is doing great!" Oni reassured her. "Oni missed Mom a lot!"

"Have you been eating enough raw meat?" her mom asked worriedly.

"Um, Oni is...Oni is on a diet," Oni muttered, unsure of how to answer.

"Oni!" her mother scolded her. "You know raw meat is the best for you! You want it fresh, screaming, and kicking! You can break its legs, of course. That won't affect your health. But you should have a nutritious, balanced meal every day! Got it?"

"Y—yes, Mom," Oni mumbled.

"And look at how small you are! Evilness, have you been staying in a puny human-sized form this entire time? You need to get exercise and stretch from time to time! Grow to giant-level and crush a few cities or something! Too much standing around is bad for your body and health!"

"Okay, mom," Oni said meekly. "Is Dad home too?"

"Oh, he's just about to head out. He's so busy these days. You should hear how much the Dark Lord keeps whining to him." Monstre mimicked a booming, demonic voice. "Teuful, help me gather my armies! Teuful, assist me with the monster clans! Teuful, I'll give you a month of music streaming services if you help us slaughter Sector Seven!" She laughed. "Honestly, I don't know why Dad chooses to put up with him."

Monstre yelled towards the clan's doorstep. "Fiend! Get over here!"

"I already heard!" a loud voice roared, and a man in fearsome black battle armor over a stylish aqua suit rushed over. Teuful, also called "Fiend" by friends and family, looked at Oni from the screen. He had brown eyes and short, spiky black hair.

"Thank the devil," Oni's dad said. "You take care of yourself out there, okay? I need to go to a clan meeting with the Blue and the Red Ogre Dragons. Red Lord Apollinus and Lady Eldra of the Lake will be there, too."

Oni blabbered a few sentences about what had happened to her. "Okay! Oni got cursed by meanie gods! Now Oni is in a cafe with three other workers and always teleporting every three days!"

"Argh, our dumb-dumb little Oni always getting into such a mess," her dad sighed. "A war dragon running a cafe?" He raised his eyebrows and looked thoughtful. "I hope they pay you as much as the Dark Lord did. Do they have retirement pension? Medical benefits? Good working environment?"

"Um—Oni made a billion credits with others! Oni is liking them very much!"

"That's my girl!" her dad roared. "Slaughter those meatballs! Make the customers cower under your presence! Stomp them down and ruthlessly extract money from their meat bag bodies as they beg for food and mercy!"