Terms and Conditions (ONC 2023)

01

 Harley's POV

You can often tell whether a date is going to work out within the first couple of minutes. However, I think this date was going well - until it wasn't.

     Samuel something-or-other had been prepared. He was mostly clean-looking and had made an effort to dress to the occasion. He held the door open for me, made sure to find us a couple of stools at the bar so I wouldn't feel uncomfortable, and came prepared to ask me about myself - the whole deal. But after an hour or so, Samuel got a bit too comfortable with our situation.

     I now know that Samuel has one dog and two cats, lived with his grandmother up until recently, has had three girlfriends in the past, loves Dungeons & Dragons and bigger women, and is studying to become a web designer. Which, the grandmother thing isn't a terrible situation, because, let's face it, half the men my age are in a similar boat. The attraction to bigger women helps, too, given my current situation. But this isn't information I need to know right away. It's only been around twenty minutes and he hasn't stopped talking.

     "I hope to become one of those big-time guys, you know? Maybe start my own design company," he says as he finishes his long-winded response to "How have you been lately?".

     I smile at him and take a long sip of my water through my straw. I've kept a careful eye on it since I got it in case Samuel here was only talking to distract me. Flicking my long hair over my shoulder, I set my cup down close to me. "That sounds like quite the plan you've got."

     Samuel grins and takes a drink of his club soda. "Enough about me, though. I forgot to ask, how do you feel about your job?"

     "I'm actually in between jobs right now." I tuck my feet under the footrest on my stool. "But I occasionally get called into a couple of mental health facilities to translate at appointments."

     "That sounds... interesting," Samuel says. I can't tell if he's genuinely interested or is only saying it to make me happy.

     I shrug and offer him a slight smile. "It pays the bills, and sometimes I'm not entirely sure I should be directly translating what the patients have said."

     That gets a laugh from Samuel, but instead of a normal, somewhat quiet chuckle, he cackles. Very, very loudly. 

     "Ah-heh," I say in a meek attempt at a laugh. I don't mind his laugh, but the way people around us got quiet for a second was a little embarrassing. My phone lights up, and I glance down at it, hoping that someone has texted me with even the slightest of emergencies that can get me out of this situation. No such luck.

     A woman walks past us and eyes Samuel and me discreetly then turns to say something to her partner.

     Samuel's eyes lock on the couple. "Ugh, I hate it when men dress like women. His voice gives him away."

     My lip twitches and I fight back a look of disgust. Did he really just sit here and say that like it's okay? Like it's something he says every day and people actually agree with him?

     He turns his attention away from the couple, who obviously heard him but chose not to say anything. "Anyway, I love your sense of style. That dress looks amazing on you."

     I force a smile and smooth my hands over the silky surface of my dress. This is one of my favorite dresses because it hugs my hips nicely but is ruched so it hides my stomach without me having to wear shapewear. "Thank you."

     "So, how about we get out of here? I can walk you home if you'd like?" Samuel waves at the bartender, who puts up a finger as he speaks with another customer.