Revelations of the Heart

Raphael Alone

Raphael, 19 years old.
New York, New York 2018
Aella was killing me. She turned 18, and got her first boyfriend, and Casey was just ok with it. Meanwhile I stayed in a constant state of agitation. It felt like there was an itch just under my skin that I couldn't reach knowing she was always with him. When she came to the lair she reeked of him. It pissed me off, even though it shouldn't because she wasn't mine. Of course, being the idiot I am, I took it out on her, and by association Mikey, whenever I saw them, and then I took it out on low-level scum at night. Purple Dragons and petty purse snatchers all suffered my wrath under my assumed persona, the Nightwatcher. In hindsight, it was kinda lame, but I was tired of waiting around for Leo to come home. About a year after he left Master Splinter pulled me aside to say he thought Leo was talking to him across the 'astral plane' or something. That he couldn't come home yet, he wasn't ready. I thought he was being selfish. He had responsibilities here, and I wasn't the right guy to take them on. Obviously with how I was treating Aella I was right. Leonardo would never act like that, and I knew it, which made me madder. He was so much better in every way, including with Aella. He was gentle, and patient, and compassionate, but still a capable and firm voice of reason for all of us. Whenever he DID come back home we all knew it was his plan to train Aella to be a full kunoichi. Splinter wanted her to be his first student because she was as good a student as Leo was a teacher. Of course she was, she was perfect. I shook my head to clear it. I was currently sitting on the roof across from Casey's apartment. Aella was due home any minute now and I couldn't help myself from making sure she got in safely. Casey and April went out on a date and Mikey was watching Shads for the night so Aella could go out. After a few more minutes of waiting I saw her and her boyfriend come around the corner. They looked so happy, and I could hear the excitement in her voice from my post. They hugged, and something twinged in my chest. When they separated, the guy, Kai, I think, turned and ran across the street, I guess toward home. Aella was digging in her bag, an old canvas thing that was covered in sharpie drawings, and wasn't watching her surroundings. While I watched, I saw two guys with purple dragon tats coming down the sidewalk, talking loudly, and stumbling. I was willing her to find her keys faster, before they saw her, but then it was too late. They got louder as they approached, and she finally noticed. She looked up, and then, keys in hand, she began to unlock the door. I knew she wasn't gonna make it inside before the thugs got to her, so I made my way down and dropped right behind the two men, knocking their heads together quickly and shoving them into the alley. Aella heard the noise and turned, eyes widening. I was in my Nightwatcher getup, so there was no way she recognized me. I started to jump up to the fire escape, when she called out, 'Hey! You're that Nightwatcher guy right? From the news? I guess I should thank you. I'm usually more aware of my surroundings than that.' I just grunted in response, but she kept talking, walking closer. 'What's your real name? My sister-in-law is April O'Neal, from Channel 6. She could give you some real recognition if you wanted it.' She was next to me now, looking up at me in the dim light. She squinted, and then her eyes got wide again. Before I could react she flung open my trenchcoat and gasped. 'Raphael! I knew that was you. You're the vigilante? Of course you are. I don't know how none of us figured it out before. I mean honestly, Raph. A giant turtle in a trenchcoat?' I cleared my throat. Actually Casey had figured it out a while ago. He had caught me lingering one night, watching Aella through the loft window. He had given me hell about it once he figured out it was me, but he had calmed down when I said that I had seen some PDs hanging around. I'm pretty sure he bought it, and after that he busted a few heads with me, without April knowing. He just wanted to blow off steam, and she wouldn't approve. I was positive nobody else knew. Well, besides Aella now. 'Yeah, well it's worked pretty damn good for over a year. I got tired of waiting for the boy scout to come back, so what? And how did you know it was me without seeing my face?' She looked away and swallowed, hard, blushing. The sight made my mouth go dry, and I licked my lips. 'Your scent.' She said quietly. I suddenly felt hot all over. 'My- my scent? You recognized my scent?' She rolled her eyes. 'I've slept in your room Raphael, of course I know what you smell like. All of you smell a little different, besides the fact that you all use different scented products. It's not a big deal.' She was so wrong. It felt like a huge deal just then. I felt a rush of adrenaline out of nowhere, and stepped toward her, reaching my hand down to grab her face before I realized what I was doing. She stepped back, hitting the wall, and looked up at me with a confused expression, snapping me out of it. I redirected, picking something imaginary out of her hair and taking a step back. 'Sorry, uh, you had something. So, that guy is some Romeo, huh? Not even waiting for you to get inside before leaving? You're dating him cause of his hair aren't ya?' She laughed a little. 'Kai and I aren't dating anymore. We're just friends. But anyway it's not your concern.' Her tone changed, and she said, 'Why are you being so familiar all of a sudden? You've been a downright asshole lately. I didn't need to be saved tonight if that's what you think. I can handle myself. Actually, how did you know those guys were here? Were you spying on me just now?' I stepped back again. 'I was just trying to be friendly, geez. And no I wasn't spying on you. I just happened to be going by. You're not exactly worth spying on, Jones.' She stepped forward. 'Jones? You can't even use my name?' She kept coming, and I backed up more. 'All I've ever been to you was nice, and decent, and even though we don't have any real reason to cross paths like I have with Donnie and Mikey I had hoped we could at least be friends in passing, because you're my brothers best friend, and because, you know what? I care about you Raphael. I don't know why, and god knows I don't want to anymore after how you've treated me, but I can't get you out of my head.' I was against the far wall now, and she was so close I could smell her. Vanilla sweat, and anger, and pain. I had caused that pain, and I hated myself for it, but I couldn't help the thrill that went through my body hearing her say she couldn't get me out of her head. 'You're in here, and in here', she said, tapping her head, and then her chest. It took everything in me not to pull her into me, consequences be damned, but then she said, 'But I can't anymore. It's cool, Raphael. Because I'm done. I'm done tiptoeing around you just because you don't like me, and I'm definitely done trying to be your friend, or whatever. So I'm going inside, and you are going to f*** off. Capisce?' She turned on her Converse-clad heel and rounded the corner out of sight. I couldn't move, and the blood was pounding in every inch of my body. I had never been more attracted to her than I was when she had me cornered. I never knew she had it in her. Unfortunately, with that fact came the realization that I had royally effed up.