Black hearts 🖤

The arguments

In the morning we wake up early so I can slyly sneak out of his house see Farhan and I have a lot in common here's jus a few things We have the same Humor, We both like basketball, We are always either happy or Depressed, We have the same taste in music, We are Always abusing each other, We are Always asking for gum that's only some of them anyways since it's the weekend we decided to go on that date oooh lala we both had fancy clothes I had a nice long black dress with a cardigan and some flats and he had a nice jumper with jeans and trainers so we went to a place called Sophia's it was like Lebanese food it was great then we went on a drive Farhan was singing barbie girl like it was his anthem

 "I'm a barbie girl in a barbie world life is plastic it's fantastic" I turn the volume down "you know that's not the words right" I say grinning "well there my lyrics cutie" we were driving up to the beach and we set up a fire "you know we could've jus went to Salems Aisha" "yes but it's better here more chill Salem is gonna annoy us the whole time"  I look into his eyes and he looks into mine and he moves towards me "so did you enjoy our date" he says as he lays down on the sand "well it was my first one so I don't know" I say as I lie on his chest "you are so" "so what Farhan" "so Aisha" "yep exactly" I look up at him and he smiles at me and says "I love you" I was a bit stunned when I heard him say that "I...I" he got up and looked at me "you heard what I said right" he says confused "yes... but I don't know what to say" my heart felt weird "huh I don't think I'm hearing you right you said you don't know what to say" 

he sounded pissed off like really pissed off "it's not that easy to say things like that how am I supposed to know how many girls you've said that too Farhan" "wow is that what your thinking about me and other girls" I had felt sick "yes I am okay I don't know how to say that what to say how to react" he had tears in his eyes "you don't love me" "no Farhan I never said that" "say it then" I got up and put my shoes on "Aisha say it" "Farhan I can't okay I can't" "your some crazy bitch you know I tell you I love you and you can't say it back why did I even do this" I got so mad "what the fuck did you jus call me a crazy bitch maybe I am okay but ask your self that question why did you even do this it definitely wasn't because you trying to get in with my best friend or anything" I walk off up to the car park "I'm not done fucking talking" he grabs our stuff and throws it in the car while I'm walking to the bus stop 

"I said I'm not done talking" he runs up to me and grabs my arm "ow what the actual fuck are you doing let go of me" he saw my eyes filled with pain and hurt so he let go "let me take you home" I wanted to slap him in the face "just leave me the fuck alone" and he walks off to his car and drives off leaving me at the bus stop I get the bus home and my family is still in England so I was home alone I put on a movie and called over Juliet and during the movie I start crying "hey what's up what's wrong" "me and Farhan had an argument on the beach he called me a crazy bitch he grabbed my arm then tried to take me home" she was so pissed off

 "why what the actual fuck is he fucking dumb I swear I'll kill him why did he say that" "he... he... he told me he loved me and I couldn't say it back so he got pissed and he did all that" she hugs me while I'm crying "hey it's okay don't worry he's mad because you didn't say you loved him and he thinks you don't love him and I know you do but he doesn't realize it" I look at her "I think me and him are done I jus don't see this working out we're opposites he's popular and I'm not he's confident and I'm not we're two different people the next day me and Farhan spoke "I'm so sorry okay I love you I really do i don't know what the fuck happened to me yesterday" I had a sadness in my eyes and it looked like he had been crying his eyes were all red and swollen "Farhan I like you but this is toxic I can't do this anymore I jus think we're not right for each other" "no Aisha you can't say that we can try again we will go slower I swear I'll do better" "I'm sorry"

 I gave him his necklace and walked away the next two weeks of school were horrible we were ignoring each other I wasn't eating again It had gone back to the way it used to be in after two weeks of miss curly being off school she came back and he sat down next to me "miss can I move seats" miss curly was always pissed of for some reason like she was never happy maybe she had a shit life I don't know but she screamed at me saying "I jus changed the seating plan and you want to move jus fucking sit down" I was jus like okay then "so for the next couple of weeks we're going to be writing an essay with our table partners it can be about whatever but you have to work together" I jus look at him and he's on his phone sending snaps to people "so are you gonna do this or not" "Aisha I don't care do what you want" "I fucking hate you so much for once can you jus do something"

 he jus sits on his phone I start writing then he takes the pencil off me "so what's it about since your the pro writer Aisha" ugh he makes me so mad "it's about an overconfident Self Centred selfish rude guy who ruined his relationship with his girlfriend" wow that felt good to say out loud "no no no I think it's about a girl who couldn't admit to loving her boyfriend because she has no feelings for him" then we both ignored each other and sat in silence for the rest of lesson one time we had pe and I skived it in the woods behind school and surprise surprise I saw Farhan "so you following me now" "Aisha you made me mad so I had to get out" "ye whatever" I turn the other way and sit on the wall for a bit and listen to music "you want some juice" "no Farhan I'm good" he sits next to me he looks at me and I look at him he picks me up and puts me on her lap and he puts his forehead on mine 

"you messed me up so bad but I love it because I love you" "I fucking hate you Farhan" he gives me a kiss that lingers for a second "say it again" "I hate you" he kisses me again and he looks into my eyes and gives me a kiss on my head then I realized what I was doing I get off the wall and push him off the wall "what the fuuuck" I walk away laughing that happened on a daily let's say everyday ok I know that's bad but that's the way we are after a couple of weeks we had a deep talk again "so Aisha I want to try again we've been doing this in secret and I don't wanna hide it anymore" we walk inside his house to his room and I jump on his bed he takes off his shirt and puts some joggers on "I'm gonna get changed don't look at me Farhan" 

I steel one of his hoodies and before I put it on he comes behind me and hugs me "Farhan..." but his eyes are closed I turn around and he slowly kisses my neck then kisses my lips and he picks me up and lays me down on his bed and kisses my stomach, my thighs and my legs then before he does anything else we hear the house door open "shit who's that" he puts me under the blanket and goes on his phone when someone opens the door...