Burning Heart // CL16

Thirty Eight

Alessia's POV

I clear my throat as I look at him looking at me and watch as he glances guiltily up at me as a blush covers his cheeks and he lifts his tea to his lips to take another sip before moving forward. Leaning on his forearms as he looks at me, eyebrows creased as he waits for me to say something and I know that I need to find the words even though all my rehearsed ones have left me. "So," I say as my heart rate picks up again and I let my eyes meet his, watching as his patience begins to run thin but he tries to disguise it as he can tell that I'm struggling to get my words out.

"Alessia... why am I here?" He asks after a minute more of silence and his eyebrows raise and I bite down as I squint lightly at him.

"I have something to tell you," I hear myself saying more, completely out of it as his confusion just grows and he takes another sip of his tea. I should definitely wait until he's not got boiling hot water in his hand or mouth, I think to myself and wait for him to finish. "Er... France?" I ask him and he nods before I realise that's the wrong thing to say, squeezing my eyes shut as I shake my head to signal that I went wrong. "No, erm, Singapore," I say as I force my eyes open just to find that he's not on the other side of the counter anymore, instead he's sat on the stool beside where I'm leaning on the counter and before I can react his hand is over mine.

"I... I'm really sorry about Singapore, I-I was trying to make something work that was never going to and I shouldn't have let you go and I've regretted it everyday since and I know you might not believe me but-" I cut him off as I tear my hand away from his.

"Charles, stop. Th-that's not what I'm trying to say," I say quickly as I try to stop him from whatever it is that he's going to say, knowing full well that if it's what I want to hear, he won't mean it when he knows what I have kept from him. I catch myself running my hands through my hair as the stress starts to get the better of me before I hear my phone ring in my pocket. I pull it out from instinct and stress looking for a distraction and see Kiraz's name before rejecting the call and setting it on the table as I put a hand over my eyes. "I mean it is but it isn't... I was trying to tell you something in Singapore that day but I-I couldn't because of what you said-," I'm cut off when my phone rings again and I see Charles's eyes drop down to it and the frown of confusion increase over his face as I reject another call.

"You can get that," he says motioning to it and I shake my head as I panic slightly. I don't want to do that but Kiraz has Ruby and if she's calling me then it probably isn't good. Knowing those two pieces of information is causing my brain to scramble even more and so I'm stressing out. I bite down on my lip as I drum my fingers against the counter top nervously before relenting and picking it up, pressing on the missed call notification as I raise it to my ear and turn away from Charles, pushing myself into the smallest corner of the room.

"Ki... what's up?" I whisper as I move my hair behind my ear, panicking as I turn to watch Charles closely, covering my mouth so he can't see or hear my words as I watch him analyse me. This is not good.

"Uh, she's just... she may have fallen over at the park but she-she's fine, although she won't stop crying," she mutters and my eyes widen as I almost drop my phone to the floor in a moment of stress.

"She what?!" I almost yell as my eyes widen in panic. "Kiraz how could you?!" I yell down the phone in a loud whisper as I turn away from Charles. "Forget it just text me where you are, I'll be right there," I tell her before hanging up the phone as I turn around to Charles. "I-I'm sorry but I have to go..."

"Alessia... come on, what is going on?" Charles asks again, finally losing his calm as he stands up straight. Hand on my wrist to hold me in place, not tight enough to stop me from doing what I want but enough to make my breath catch in my throat.