Envy Me [h.s]

are you happy? pt. 2

Harry's POV:

My Maeve...

I took a deep breath as I looked across the room of people dressed in black. "Standing here today makes me realize that my Maeve was loved, cared about, and important to so many people. I will never finish thanking every single one of you for being here today."

"I will never be able to find the right words to describe how she makes me feel. I wished she could see how her smile could light up anyone's world and make them truly happy. I think that is what I will miss most about her." I wipe a few tears with the back of my hand and continue. "Throughout the years, I've had the privilege of calling her my wife, being with her, and loving her. She gave me the greatest gift I could ever ask for, my Lana." I look up to see Lana running towards me, my mum trying to sit her back down but failing. I pick her up, and she buries her head in the crock of my neck. "I am so grateful for every second I spent with her, and you should be too. Being around Maeve was a privilege, and you should feel like one of the luckiest people in the world for knowing her and being a part of her life," I blinked the tears away from my eyes and cleared my throat. "Thank you."

8 months ago:

"Is- is there anything else we can do? Did you already try another doctor? Maybe if we go somewhere else, they could know what's wrong? Baby, we can fi-"

"I'm so sorry I lied," she said, sobs escaping her lips.

"Maeve. Baby, please look at me," I begged with tears in my eyes. I couldn't believe what she was telling me. She sat at the bottom of the bed, and I knelt before her, my thumb rubbing circles on her ankle. "Please talk to me."

"I'm so sorry," She said through sobs.

I wiped her tears, grabbing both sides of her face and making her look at me. "Don't. Don't apologize for this, baby. This is not your fault."

"But I lied to you." She started to inhale as much air as her lungs allowed her to. She couldn't breathe. Her eyes swelled as tears flew out and ran down her cheeks.

"Darling. I need you to breathe. I need you to breathe and listen to me. Can you do that for me?" I asked. Her eyes closed shut. "Maeve, open your eyes. I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere."

She opened her eyes, and this sight is one I will never forget. She was broken. She felt alone. "Count with me," I whispered, reaching for Maeve's hand. She gripped my hand and began to count with me.

"1... 2... 3... 4... 5..."

We continued like this for a while, counting to five before breathing in, then to five before breathing out. Maeve's breathing finally slowed down. "Are you mad at me?" She asked.

"There is no reason to be mad. Maeve, baby, I promise I will never be mad at you," I whisper, brushing my fingers through her hair. I hate seeing her cry, especially knowing she's been bottling this up for a long time.

She's been suffering all alone, and I had no idea.

Present:

Sitting in one of the pews in the back. I sit Lana on my lap. I lean down to whisper in her ear. "Lovey, remember what I told you before we got here?" I asked. She looked at me through her eyelashes and said, "You uhm, you said," she looked down at her hands. "I said-" I began to speak, but she interrupted me. "I remember, daddy, just give me time."

Maeve and I had always been very fond of teaching Lana how to speak for herself, and we were thrilled she was starting to do it. It was a pain in the ass most times because she took speaking up for herself as talking back to your parents. "You said I could talk to you, or nina or aunt Gem, about what I feel right here," she said, with her hand on the other side of where her heart is.