#4

70 1 0
                                    

Nalu: “sSSSHIT- I BURNT MY LIP-“
Captain: “...Why the fuck would you even drink coffee with a METAL STRAW in the FIRST PLACE??”
Nalu: “BECAUSE WE WERE OUT OF THE PLASTIC ONES!”

*Void left Elodie in charge while she went out…*
Faye: “Christmas lights?”
Elodie: “Check.”
Konics: “Thermos of hot cocoa?”
Elodie: “Check.”
Nel: “Santa suits?”
Elodie: “Check.”
Micah: “Shovel?”
Elodie: “Check.”
Moki: “Alibi and bail money?”
Elodie: “Check- wait, WHAT?!”

Krit and Faye:”I already sent good vibes your way. They’re coming. There’s nothing you can do to stop them.”
Theo:”…This is the most threatening way I’ve ever been cheered up.”

Void: “I hope you have an explanation for this.”
Elodie: “We have three actually-“
Nalu: “Pick your favorite.”

I have made it my goal to post atleast 1 incorrect goal per week so here is today’s..

*Comments under an image of a really hot knife cutting bread*
Captain: “Imagine stabbing someone with this knife.”
Nalu: “It would instantly cauterize the wound, so the person wouldn't bleed, so it's not very useful.”
Void: “If you want information it is”
Elodie: “why would you STAB a person when you can have TOAST?”

Orion:”Thoughts on Marius”
Krit who has been hanging out with Theo:”a piece of shit 10/10 would stab again”
Faye turning to Theo:”You’re a bad influence.”
Theo:”whaaat me?”

*Elodie is cooking*
Krit: Any chance that’s for me?
Elodie: It’s for Void. I’m planning on making some bad choices tonight, and I need them on my side.
Theo: I never realized the forethought that went into being a disappointment.

Void: You lying, cheating, piece of sh!t!
Micah: Oh yeah? You’re the idiot who thinks you can get away with everything you do. **WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD**
Void: I’m leaving you, and **I’M TAKING NULA WITH ME**
Elodie, picking up the monopoly board: I think we’re gonna stop playing now.

Nel, banging on the door: Faye! Open up!
Faye: Well, it all started when I was a kid...
Elodie: No, they meant-
Theo: Let them finish.

Nel: Have you seen a person named 'Theo' around here?
Elodie: Ugh, yes. They made a horrible mess of the blood fountain.
Micah: It looks fine to me?
Elodie: IT USED TO BE WATER!!!

(Tell me this isn't somewhat accurate)
Theo and Fayes Parents: Tonight, one of you will betray us.
Guard: Is it me, [REDACTED]?
Theo and Fayes Parents: No, it’s not you.
Orion's Mothers: Is it us, [REDACTED]?
Theo and Fayes parents: It’s not you either.
Marius: Is it me, [REDACTED]?
Theo and Fayes Parents: ...
Theo and Fayes Parents, mockingly: Is IT mE [REDACTED]?

Theo:”you see an orca with a scar on over its eye what do you do?”
Krit:”Say hi and and ask if they’re okay?”
Theo:”no,You stab them Krit”
Krit:”oh okay-“

Theo: I can't
Faye: You can
Theo: No, I cannot
Faye: I believe in you!
Theo, walking up to people: Hi, I am Theo. I would like to be acquainted with you.
Villager: Hurh
Theo: *stabs*
Faye: *sighs* That's the 60th person today, Theo.
Theo: **It **threatened me!
Faye: It...it really didn't

Orion: He stole from me first!
Theo: Mhm.
Orion: Stole my heart...
Micah: It is still illegal to commit murder.
--------------------------------
Krit: Oo~ A heart!

Idk if this was made yet, apologies if it was.

Konics: "The plan is kinda changing so we're just gonna take you with us.."
Nalu: "Am I being kidnapped?"
Konics: "No no no"
Nalu: "Can I leave?"
Konics: "No"

Krit:”I just figured out there’s an actual clinical name for what you call it  when you can’t sleep at night so you just eat instead”
Theo:”uh huh-”
Faye:”it’s insom-nomnomnomnom-nia”
Theo:”why-“

Void: We've been conducting an ongoing study to see what Krit will and will not eat.
Nym: Grass? Yes!
Nel: Moss? Yes!!
Elodie: Leaves? Ohh, yes!
Nula: Pufferfish? Strange but true!
Joshie: Worms? Sometimes!
Faye: Rocks? Usually nah.
Orion: Twigs? Usually!
Micah: Elodie's cooking? Inconclusive!
Captain: How did you… test this?
Theo: You just hand them stuff and say "eat this" and if they eat it, they eat it.
Captain: ...I don't know how to feel about this.
Faye: Wait... **IS THAT WHERE ALL MY SPARE PUFFERFISH WENT?**

Theo, yelling: ANARCHY, anARCHY, AnaRcHY
Faye and Nel: We have no idea what that means but we love it!

Void: Anyone d-
Theo: Depressed?
Joshie: Drained?
Nym: Dumb?
Orion: Disliked?
Void:-done with their work...do you guys need a hug?

Faye: Poison is a magic transmutation potion that turns people into corpses.
Nym: This knife is actually a magic wand.
Orion: Meet me in the Denny's parking lot for a wizard duel.
Void: *skillet*
Krit: I have no idea what any of that means! BUT I LOVE IT!

Faye: Krit, no
Krit: Krit, yes!
Faye: No!
Krit: Yes!
Faye: **NOOOO!**
Krit: **Y E S!**
Theo, swimming into the cavern: What the heck is- **OH MY GOD!**
Krit, holding Theo's tridents: I am a god!
Faye, looking at Theo: ...
Theo: What?
Faye: Your a bad influence...and a child

Captain: You know those things will kill you, right?
Void, pouring another glass of whiskey: That’s the point.
Elodie, continuosly banging into objects: We’re trying to speed up the process.
Nula: *Nods while eating rotten flesh*

Bite: Konics kidnaps people-
Elodie: oh Konics? Yeah they’re my neighbour, they’re cool

Mer smp quotesWhere stories live. Discover now