♡ ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ꜱᴀʏ ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ♡

2 7

(Cary's POV)

I don't remember falling asleep, but I remember waking up.

I was dazed, my mind silent as my eyes fluttered open. It was odd yet satisfying that I didn't dream, because if I did, I knew it would be about something I didn't want to think about.

I briefly panicked at the unfamiliar surroundings before realizing I was in the hospital. I thought I was alone until I heard a quiet, "Good morning, sleepy head."

I turned to see Johnny sitting by the bed. He was holding my hand and rubbing circles into it. It soothed me.

I smiled at the sight of him—he was just the person I needed right then. "Hey," I said, squeezing his hand, albeit weakly. I looked around. "How long was I out?" My voice sounded small and weak.

He shrugged. "I dunno, I just got here." His voice was calm and soothing.

I noticed none of the other guys were there. "How did you get here?"

"Soda."

"Where is he?"

"He and Pony went to get Darry."

I bit the inside of my cheek. I felt bad for getting Darry and Soda out of work. We couldn't afford it.

Suddenly, I was swarmed with a wave of panic—how were we going to pay for this? We hardly had enough money to scrape by with bills and groceries, much less hundreds of dollars in medical bills.

I leaned my head against the pillow again, my head aching slightly. Sleep seemed to help with my head, and I began to wonder if that had anything to do with it. Nevertheless, it still pounded as if my heart was in my skull.

I shouldn't be worrying about this right now, it was only going to make it worse. Something I hated about myself was my chronic issue of overthinking—I couldn't help it.

"They should be here soon," Johnny said suddenly. I turned to see him looking out the window and into the hallway.

That hallway...I didn't like it. It came with hurt and painful memories that stung: I was all too familiar with the scent of the hospital, the feel of its air. I remembered the day of the crash, the day I knew my life would never be the same.

It was a cold day in January, only a couple of days after Darry's 20th birthday. I was sitting in English class, probably daydreaming about Jonathan, as he was in my previous class, Algebra.

It was about halfway through class when I was told I was being checked out early. Of course, I was thrilled, and didn't think much of it. Mom had told Ponyboy and I that we were going to a doctor's appointment that day, but she never told us when. I assumed it must have been then, so I practically skipped down the office.

But instead of being met with my mother's golden presence, I saw, sitting in the chair by the desk, Darry. He looked deflated and panicked, his eyes darting around the room. When they met my own, he gestured for me to sit in the chair next to him.

"What's wrong, Darry?" I asked him, placing my books in my lap.

He chewed on his fingernails. "Do you know where Pony is?"

I shook my head. "No, I haven't seen him since lunch." I was starting to worry. "Why?"

"I'll tell you when Pony gets here," he said, his voice shaky, "so I only have to say it once."

I didn't know why he only wanted to say it once, but now I do.

"Cary?" Johnny's voice breaks me out of my memory. "You okay?"