Invisible String - Sebastian Sallow

Chapter Five: The Weight of it All

Sebastian and Ominis stood in the Undercroft, both faces pale, both men taken back to all the horrible things that had happened fifth year, both waiting for me expectantly. I stepped gingerly through the grate and had to push past the flood of memories that were fighting for my attention.

Right now, in this moment, I needed to talk to my two closest friends.

I only hoped the friends were here to meet me.

Sebastian's brown eyes were heavily shrouded by his brows, which were furrowed down in seriousness, he was wringing his hands together, clearly deep in thought. It took him a moment to process that he was seeing me standing before him, just as pale and nervous as he was.

He nudged Ominis with his elbow, and it was the blind Slytherin who broke the growing silence. His voice cut the thick tension, a definite note of seriousness to his tone that I had grown all too familiar with. "Abbi, I'm glad you could come."

I stepped closer to the two, dropping my bag to the ground as I did so. I was hot under my school robes, my tie feeling constricting against my throat and shirt collar. Quickly, I unclasped my robes with one hand and shrugged them off, throwing them to the floor next to my bag, while the other hand loosened my green tie. I'd regret the layer of dust on my robes later, but I had far more important things to think about now.

"Well, yeah," I replied to Ominis. "I couldn't exactly focus on anything else after that lesson."

Sebastian gave a small crooked grin to me, before dropping it from his lips. Clearly we aren't at that stage yet in this conversation. "That was quite the lesson."

Ominis sighed, pacing nervously back and forth. "Look, this is serious, Sebastian. I hardly think this is the time for jokes."

"We aren't joking, Ominis," I said, a little annoyed by his assumption. "You weren't next to us to feel our panic when she told us what our year would look like. Do you really think we want to revisit any of it?"

Ominis nodded towards me. "I - You're right, Abbi, that was rather presumptuous of me. I simply think we need to discuss some ground rules about this year."

Sebastian scoffed lightly, "Ground rules? Ominis, did you not just hear her? Neither of us wants to repeat the events of fifth year. Least of all me, which you know."

"Yes, I know. And if we could have paired in threes, I wouldn't feel this conversation or effort particularly necessary," his voice held a slight amount of venom to it and I winced slightly. I knew the cause of this rift was my doing. I had encouraged Sebastian, I had allowed him do cross that edge when I had allowed him to cast that curse. I needed to apologize for it, and that apology was long overdue. He continued on, "I however am partnered with Miss Poppy Sweeting, and I thought we should discuss how we are going to go about that particular hurtle."

"Poppy isn't a hurtle," I said softly, refusing to look away from Ominis. "She's a good friend, and not so innocent herself. Her parents are poachers, she's been through a lot."

Sebastian's mouth opened like he wanted to say something, but closed it again quickly as though he decided that now was not the time for whatever he wanted to say about Poppy's parents. I nodded my head to him gratefully.

"That may be true, but, I suppose I am asking you what she may have learned from you, Abbi."

My mouth dropped open, a flash of hot anger ripping through my body. "What she may have learned from me? Ominis, you can't be serious!"

This time Sebastian did interject, "I don't imagine she's taught Sweeting any of those curses, Ominis, if that's what you're implying." Anger had seeped into his voice, eyes flashing dangerously as he stepped towards his best friend. I hadn't even noticed he'd moved to stand by me. The realization of his proximity to me followed by his defending me had a small heat rise to my cheeks that I quickly ducked my head down to hide.

"I haven't told anyone anything. I'm not daft, you know. I know what happens if people know what the two of us did- you were an unwilling participant." I looked up at Ominis, feeling the lump rise to the back of my throat. I was dangerously close to tears, but I couldn't tell if they were from anger or hurt.

Probably both.

We all sat in silence for a moment, Ominis still pacing back and forth, while I had elected to sit against one of the large crates the room held. Sebastian had wandered off deeper into the Undercroft, his footsteps quiet against the dust. I really took a moment to examine the layer of dust, and noted that it was several inches thick. Apparently, none of us had come here since that last meeting.

I tore my gaze from the floor and stood. I saw Sebastian standing by Isadora Morganach's pensive, his gaze locked on it, transfixed. I shuddered at the memory of what we had been shown. Of what it had led to.

"We can't tell Poppy," I said, breaking the silence. Ominis stopped in his pacing and Sebastian tore his gaze from the stone basin, walking over to me, eyes searching me. "You know we can't- if it comes up, we dance around it. She can't know."

I locked eyes with him at this, and I knew he could read me like an open book. I knew he understood what my fear was. If Poppy knew, if it slipped that I had used these curses, I could lose her.

And then I would truly be alone.

"Poppy won't know," Sebastian said, his hand reaching out for mine. I looked down at his long fingers just as he dropped his hand. He'd clearly wanted to comfort me. And I had to fight the urge to grab his hand myself.

"If it's easier, I can suggest we do all our studying together. If we are together, it should be easier." I knew Poppy would be open to the idea. She didn't know Ominis as our friendship had dissolved before I could introduce her to either of them properly. It was bound to make her more comfortable. Sebastian nodded at my words again, his hands shoved into his pockets now.

"That settles that," Ominis said briskly. "Now if you two will excuse me."

He grabbed his wand from his robes, the familiar red light ignited on its tip and he marched out of the Undercroft. Sebastian and I were left alone, staring at the grate as it closed behind him. We stayed like that for a while, both looking everywhere but each other.

I moved to pick up my robes, slinging my bag over my shoulder too. If Sebastian wasn't going to talk to me, then why did I bother staying any longer?

The grate squeaked as I pulled it open again, hesitating for a fraction of a second.

"Do you think about it?"

I whipped around to face him. His voice was quiet, carrying across the empty space to me with ease. My eyes scanned the room, searching for him. He was no longer standing beside the pillar as he had been mere seconds ago. Instead, he was back at the pensive. Too much had happened there that I couldn't be sure of what he had meant by his vague question.

"About what?"

My voice was barely a whisper, as though the words were stuck in my throat, clawing their way up my vocal chords and spilling from my lips.

"All of it," he said, a little more volume to his voice now. His eyes were staring into the dark liquid of the pensive, immovable. "Do you ever think about all of it?"

My breath caught as the memories tried to shove themselves forward again. I squeezed my eyes shut and curled my hands into tight fists. "All the time."

He looked up at me now, his eyes soft. "Abbi, I- I'm sorry."

I could tell he meant it. I could see the sorrow in his eyes, see the sadness and pain permanently embedded in his gaze. I nodded, unsure of what to say. I let my eyes move down to the pensive, myself getting lost in the swirling memories. "Me, too," I choked out. "I'll see you in class, Sebastian."

And then I was turning away from him, pulling the grate open again and flinging myself from the Undercroft before we could talk any more.