smoke breaks | proxies

v.

I wasn't sure how it had happened, and I may be a bad person for it, but I could regret it in the morning. Nothing was on my mind besides Tim's mouth pressed against mine, and the way his hands were unbuckling my belt. We had started at the porch, just an innocent kiss that fell into more and more until I was stumbling through my house with him right in front of me, both of us pawing at each other like horny teenagers. My head was reeling, skin practically aflame. When was the last time I did this?

Still, I froze as he went to unbutton my pants, and he pulled away almost immediately, still so good at sensing my mood. "Are you okay with this? We can stop here."

I blinked at him, discomfort sitting heavy in my stomach, horniness pushed to the back burner as I realized something. I had never told him I was trans. I wasn't sure how he'd react- if he would even still be into me.

"Hey, hey," he pulled his hands away, but stayed close. "I'm not gonna get mad if you don't want to do this. We can just chill, or I could leave if that's what you'd want."

"No, n-no, I-I- I jus-ss-st- I-" I stumbled over my words even more than usual. I wanted this; I really did, but what if he didn't. Fuck, there was no point in beating around the bush, huh? "I-I'm trans!"

Tim paused, blinking slowly. I could practically see the gears in his head turning. "You're trans?"

I nodded, tensing as he went quiet again. "T-trans male. I-I haven't- I haven't had th-that surgery ye-et," I mumbled, pointing down to my pants with my eyes.

Tim shuffled a bit before pressing his hand to my hip, leaning close again. "I don't mind."

"Huh?"

He played with my belt loop as he spoke slowly, planning out everything he said. "I mean, if you want to stop, that's completely fine like I said, but I don't really care what's in your pants – as long as it's your pants I'm getting into." He turned red after he finished, like he realized what he had said and that it sounded corny as fuck, but I didn't even care, the fire in me returning full force as I realized that he didn't care.

I pulled him into me again, more tongue and teeth than should ever be used, but it was him, and it was us, and he was pushing me onto my bed, and I was ready to take or give whatever he needed – whatever he wanted. He led us back, slowly pushing us both towards the bed until my knees hit the mattress, and I was pulling him down with me.

His hands went to my pants again, and this time I let him pull him down, kicking them off when they got low enough. My sweater was off next, and the moan I let out as he pressed his lips to my throat was downright sinful. In the back of my mind, I was glad Natalie was gone for the night to Jane's, but on the other hand, it would have been a bit of payback for the amount of times I had to overhear the two of them.

My hands pushed under Tim's shirt, pushing it up and watching as he raised himself to pull it off fully and toss it to the side. I admired the sight, hands itching to touch the newly exposed skin. He was handsome, covered in hair and muscle and fat. It was definitely a sight for sore eyes. "Y-y'know," I shakily spoke, trying to breathe properly as he let his lips press to me again and trail down my chest. "I-I don't nor-ormally p-put out on the firs-sss-st da-ate."

Tim grinned against me, I could feel the way his lips stretched across teeth before he bit down softly at my chest. "I don't either." He pressed a kiss to the start of my top surgery scar, and I practically melted. My hands carded through his hair, holding softly for some sort of control. "You're okay with this, though?" His fingers dipped into my boxers, tugging them just slightly as he looked up at me for permission.

"P-please- please!"

They were pulled off and thrown to the side without hesitation. His fingers pressed forward eagerly, and it didn't take him but a few moments to press against my t-dick and I was practically sobbing. I hadn't had physical touch like this in so long I was practically seeing stars from the barest of touches. "You're so sensitive," he mused, but he was panting against my skin, obviously just as horny as I was.