Without You (Short Story)

Chapter 7: Under The Weather Love

Avery

After a whole night of tossing and turning around in bed just thinking about this mess I got Kyle and myself into, I finally decided to just stop deluding myself that I'd ever get some sleep and just threw myself out of bed.

I went to bed early last night thinking I could get some much needed shut-eye, but boy was I wrong. The second my eyes closed all I could see was the look on Kyle's face as he bid me farewell with this gut-wrenching, heart-stabbing, pained smile. That effectively sent a flurry of conflicting emotions straight into my heart, and for hours I didn't even know that I wasn't getting any of the sleep I said I'd get.

And so, I just laid there thinking about my conversation with Chris the afternoon before, and my heart couldn't help but grow with worry. He didn't directly tell me anything, but he did say that Kyle wasn't doing okay.

Kyle rarely ever doesn't do well, but when he does, it isn't pleasant. I've known him long enough to know that when he gives up on something, he'd be the type of person to just endure all of the pain on his own. He wouldn't dare tell or show anyone that he's suffering.

And knowing that I was the cause of his pain makes my heart clench even tighter.

By the time the sun slowly started to illuminate the light walls of my bedroom through the large glass windows, I had just about had enough of all the overthinking. I decided to just cut the crap and visit Kyle over at the flat we once shared to see if he was doing okay.

Screw all the rules. I just have to know if he's okay.

I hurriedly got up from my bed and took what I think was the quickest bath I've ever taken. Then, I proceeded to put on my most comfortable clothes, eat a quick breakfast and brush my teeth, before finally flinging myself out of the front door in record time.

After a few minutes spent contemplating what I was going to do next, I finally got the courage to get inside my car and drove to the flat Kyle and I used to share. I drove around aimlessly for a while to collect my thoughts and rehearse a few lines in my head, but somehow none of them just felt right. Finally deciding to just let it all out into the hands of fate, I made my way through the nostalgic London streets leading to the flat I once called home.

Minutes later, I was carefully parked in front of the beautifully rustic brownstone building where Kyle lives. I spent a few moments just reacquainting myself with the familiar building, uncovering a few beautiful memories in the process.

The place was the first thing that Kyle and I ever got for the both of us right after we stepped out of uni, back to the time when we still thought we were going to last forever. Having been raised in a family with high regards for self-worth, respect, and marriage, I was quite apprehensive at first about the thought of living with my boyfriend. Kyle erased all traces of those worries; always taking care of me and making sure I was always comfortable before everything else, all because he had so much love and respect for me.

Taking a deep breath to brush away the bittersweet memories of the love I lost, I told myself that everything was okay with Kyle. 

He couldn't be unwell now, could he? He wouldn't let anything happen to himself, I know it.

"Bloody hell, who are you kidding Avery? You know fully well that he tends to overlook himself whenever he's down," I muttered to myself as I walked through the front door, memories silently flooding back into my head as I walked into the elevator. I pressed the number '3' and just leaned back into the cold steel wall, silently contemplating about what I was gonna say to him. 

Well, granting that he'd even open the door for me.

As the elevator dinged opened, I found navigating through the familiar halls, my heart beating wildly in its cage like it could sense that it was nearing something that made it euphoric. Surely enough, it was, because before I even knew it, I found myself standing outside of Kyle's door.