i had finished bandaging jake's hand long ago, and we were now sitting in our shared marui speaking of my knowledge as a warrior. "why were you fighting so young?" as soon as those words left his mouth, my ears pinned back and my mouth went dry. "that's.. it's, um, a sensitive subject." my words were clear but quiet. i wasn't expecting to speak of this so soon. jake immediately backed up, regretting his question.
"shit, i'm so sorry sweets. i didn't mean to upset you." he shuffled closer to rub a hand on my back, comfortingly. the pet name caught my attention and made me blush. "it's- ah, it's ok. you live with me now. you deserve to know." this time i tried to speak up a bit more. weak is not my style. jake kept his hand on my back, not speaking, just letting me talk in my own time. so i began my story. "i am the first born of three children. i was 6 when this happened; my other siblings were born. my parents doted on them, cherished them. but basically forgot me.
"they never bothered to ask me how school was, or check if i'd been ok. they fed me, like the others, but that was it. i had to put myself to sleep and get myself up. that's when i decided to do something that might make them proud. i taught myself how to fight. i picked up one of dad's spears and practiced for hours every day. sometimes even during nighttime too. i was 6." the tears started forming in my eyes then, dripping down my cheeks and my neck. jake was still sat quietly, rubbing my back. a small, broken sob escaped my throat then, and his ears flew back, while he brushed the tears off my face.
"you're okay, sweetheart. take your time." i sniffled, and took a breath, then continued. "i got older, and i got better at fighting. i started using more weapons; knives, fishing spears, anything i could get my hands on. i taught myself to use them all. but my parents didn't notice. soon i was 13, finished school and my mother tried to get me to be a healer, learn their ways. but i wanted to be a warrior. i trained hard, learnt with tonowari, and he watched my skills grow. by then my mother knew what i was doing, and she had told my father. he didn't care, he never really showed any emotion towards me.
"so i dodged my mothers demands, spent most of my time out with the other warriors in training, and after three long years, i managed to tame a tsurak. the was a huge celebration for me, and the other warriors who did the same, but my parents didn't even bother to come." more tears slowly ran down my face as i took another break. jake pulled me to his side, close, so he could wrap an arm around my shoulders. "from then on i didn't bother telling them what i accomplished, they would only shoot me down. i turned 18 two years after that and wanted to move out, gain my own freedom, but my mother made me stay. she said it was because i had to watch my siblings. make sure they were okay.
"so i stayed, for another four years, doing her job as a parent. i picked my siblings up from school, walked them home, made sure they did any homework they had, and even made food for the entire family. but it was never adequate. after 22 years of it, i'd had enough and went to tonowari to ask if i could have my own marui. he agreed and gave me this one. now i haven't seen my family in three days." my eyes had dried up now and i turned to look at jake. i expected to see him sad, maybe a pity party for my upbringing, but instead his ears were pinned back on his head, and his eyes were wild with a mix of anger and sorrow.
"kid, i am so sorry for what you had to go through. i couldn't imagine how hard that was on you." his voice was low, almost too low to be heard. "i'm ok. i'll be ok." his hand fell from my back and he brought it forward to hold my own. we sat like that for a while, together, his larger, blue hand grasping my smaller, azure one.
then the silence broke as the kids walked back into the marui after their training. me and jake shot up to our feet when they arrived, making space between our bodies. "so, how was it?" i asked first. a chorus of voices spoke at once as me and jake smiled at each child's eagerness to talk. "woah, woah, one at a time." jake smiled at his kids, and we all sat down to listen to them tell us about their day.
"hey ayla, ao'nung and tsireya said that there's usually a communal feast in the evening. could we go there for dinner?" neteyam asked me after everyone said how their day was. i smiled at his appetite, and that ao'nung had said that. "yes of course, so long as your father agrees." i glance at jake. "i don't see why not." he grins down at me. "alright then it's settled. there's usually an assortment of fish there that the hunters have caught."
we continue chatting and laughing in the hut, until the sun sets and other clan members head down to the feast. all four kids, plus me and jake traipse down the beach to where the gathering is. i find ao'nung and tsireya already there and our group sits with them. i look over to see neteyam and ao'nung side by side, talking avidly to each other. it warms my heart to see that they fit in somewhere.
everyone is eating, and i am sat with tsireya talking with her about the day. "how were the sully's?" i speak through mouthfuls of food. "they were good, lo'ak learned quicker but his heartbeat is fast..." i smile at her as she goes on about the younger sully boy. "...but his breathing got better." "i think someone has a crush." i said in a song-song voice. she blushed and looked down. "noo, i don't. they just got here like a few days ago."
then she turned the table on me. "how was training with jake?" a smirk adorned her face. my jaw dropped at the fact she thought i had a thing for the older man. "'reya! he is 42. there's no way anything could happen between us. and he has kids." "which you seem to care for like a mother." she points out with a grin on her face. a just shake my head and continue eating. there's no way i could win this battle.
"did ao'nung behave today?" i changed the subject. "yes he was ok. a few snide comments about their diving, but then him and neteyam started talking and he was fine." her observation made me look back over to the two boys, still talking and eating happily. "do you think there's something there?" i was genuinely curious, ao'nung wasn't easy to win over. he was a jerk to all the other sully kids. but not neteyam.
"you don't think... they're, what? gay?" tsireya sounded confused at what i was trying to say. "maybe. i don't know. but they look very close." my words prompted her to look over to them, see for herself. "i- ok wait they do look kinda close."
"we should hook them up." i casually said and ate another mouthful of my food. tsireya turned to me with a shocked expression. "they are 15! no. i am not hooking my brother up. he can figure that out himself." i snickered at her dramatics. "i'm joking, i'm joking. promise." she let out a relieved sigh and turned back to her own food. it had been an eventful few days and i was happy to enjoy the peacefulness, sitting with my best friend in comfortable silence.
