Beautiful Beast

Chapter 29

KALISTA

My trembling fingers slide over the midnight silk of my gown. Black. It mirrors my emotions and is somehow comforting in its familiarity. I hate to think that my life has been a constant sequence of mourning, but it is a grim reality.

Arawn rounds a hedge, and I straighten my spine and coax a smile onto my lips. "Good morning," I say, holding out my arm for him.

His eyes flicker over my dress, but he returns my expression and tucks my hand in the crook of his elbow. "Good morning."

We walk along the pebble pathway, and I lean into him. "Thank you for joining me."

"Of course. Anytime. But I should thank you for yesterday evening. I enjoyed it tremendously and I think it was just what we both needed. We have been so terribly consumed with melancholy affairs."

A true smile spreads my lips now. "I am glad you enjoyed it." We come to the archway that leads to my rose garden. "Now close your eyes for a moment."

He frowns. "Is that safe?"

"Trust me."

"Alright, alright." He closes his eyes, and I move to the stone bench where I put his gift.

Returning to him, I hold it between us. "You may open them now."

His gold irises become visible once again and stare down at the ruby-red rose. It is in full bloom and its velvet petals almost seem as if they glow.

"This is for you. A gift."

With a questioning expression, he gently takes the flower.

My voice is tentative and fragile. "I want to thank you for everything you have done for me." He takes a breath to speak, but I hastily continue. "You have been kind and brave and patient even when I was difficult and even when you did not have to be. You are the noblest man I have ever known, and your people are blessed to have you as their king."

He becomes guarded. "Kalista? Why does this sound like a goodbye?"

I shake my head lightly and touch a ruby petal. "This rose will bloom for as long you live, so you will always have me with you. And perhaps when it fades, I will see you again." Protests bud upon his face, but I reach up and place my lips upon his.

At first, he is hesitant, but then he softens and returns my kiss. It deepens and suddenly threatens to overpower me and vanquish my resolve. This is his intention. He desires to convince me to change my mind, even though he does not know exactly what I have decided. But I will not. I cannot. My hands reach up and my fingers lightly brush his neck. Magic slips from my skin onto his, and I pull away. His body has already become slack as a result of my sleeping spell, and it is only my magic that prevents him from falling to the ground.

With a slight motion of my hand, his body lifts so that he is floating in the air. I then trudge to the front of the palace where Hector waits for us. Taking the rose from Arawn's hand, I slip it into the saddlebag beside the mirror-he will have more need of it than I will.

Resolutely, my feet carry me over the pebble drive and to the forest. The magic carries Arawn along behind me and urges Hector to follow. As I step past the tree line, Abraxas whinnies from the pasture behind the stables. Hector's head swings toward his friend, but my spell forces his feet to continue plodding forward. Their display sticks needles into my heart, yet I briskly blink my eyes and continue into the embrace of the forest. I will not shed tears. This is our fate and I will approach it calmly and bravely rather than being dragged to it while weeping and flailing about.

After we have walked for some time, my sleepless nights weigh me down, and I use my magic to twist a staff from various branches. We continue, and I lean heavily on the staff so as to avoid stumbling. Through the spring quarter we trek, toward the outskirts of my domain. The farther I go from the heart of my realm, the greater the pressure becomes in my head. It is a heavy throbbing that aches behind my eyes and blurs my vision and causes the world to spin.

Closer. I need to get closer to the outside. I force my breath in then out, in then out.

Suddenly, through the haze, voices buzz into my consciousness. My eyes frantically scan the trees, but I cannot detect anything that does not belong in the green foliage.

"Stay." I lift my hand in a halting motion and Arawn's floating form hovers in the air. I then glide between the trees in search of the source of disruption. Blue clothing comes into view.

Uniforms. Soldiers. Two men walk casually through the forest-no doubt patrolling, but not doing so very mindfully. They wear blue coats with tan breeches and black boots. At their sides hang swords, and one of them holds a crossbow.

I follow them for a way until I spot more blue coats and horses. By now, my head throbs and I can barely walk in a straight line. It will be impossible for me to make it to the outskirts of the forest. This will have to do.

I return to Hector and Arawn and continue to lead them, but away from the campsite. There is no telling where the loyalties of the soldiers lie. When I can bear the pain no longer, I lower Arawn to a soft bed of leaves. Kneeling next to him, I tenderly brush a lock of golden hair from his forehead. I may never see him again.

Leaning down, I brush my lips over his. "Forgive me, Arawn." He will wake and be furious that I did this to him. Perhaps he will even hate me for it. Very well, let him hate me. It matters not.

Stiffly, I rise but need to take a moment to gain my ground again. I had forgotten the effect that travelling to the outskirts had on me-now I not only have dizziness and a headache but feel as if I will heave the contents of my stomach.

I stumble a few meters away, then pause and look back. Arawn sleeps as peacefully as a newborn babe. I must remember that face, not only the present expression, but his smile, the twinkle in his eyes, and the way his nose is not quite straight. Never will I love someone as I love him.

"Goodbye, dear-heart," I whisper, then turn away and tread wistfully to the palace.

*****

Does this break your heart? What's going to happen next?? I'd love to know what you think!