Chapter 2: Age 8

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"I'm not done talking about this!" a hysterical voice screams from the other side of the hallway. The voice belongs to Riley's mother, no matter how much she wishes it didn't.


She sits in the corner of her room, slowly rocking back and forth. In a desperate attempt to drown out the shouting, she covers her ears. "It's okay. It's okay. It's okay," she mumbles.


Even though she can't hear her parents words, she still hears the shouting. Now her father was shouting something and the only words Riley can make out are, "don't" and "love." Somehow, not hearing the words makes it worse.


Hopelessly, she drops her hands from her ears and reaches for the nearest doll. The dolls lifeless blue eyes and dark brown hair comfort Riley, and the smile on the doll's plump red lips creates a feeling of security, like everything is okay.


"How could you do this to me?"


"Can we just talk about this?"


The voices grow louder and louder, filling the room. Soon enough, her parents' shouts began to suffocate Riley. Every breathe felt like all the air in the room had been replaced with anger.


The room around her begins to feel smaller, as if the walls are closing in on her. She begins to wonder if the walls are actually moving, or if she's just imagining things.


Gasping for air, she feels a lone tear run down her face.


As the tear runs down her cheek, air begins to fill the room again. Soon, Riley can take short shallow breathes of air. As cold oxygen enters and leaves her lungs, she feels the panic slowly leave.


"Mommy and Daddy aren't fighting. They just can't hear each other," she says to her doll. "Danny told me when people get older they can't hear very well. They're not fighting."


As she speaks the words, she looks into the large blue eyes of the doll, half expecting it to nod and agree with her. Instead they just stare at her, unblinking.


Slowly, Riley picks up her hair brush and runs it through the doll's silky hair. The motion calms her down as she continues to repeat the words, "they're not fighting."


"How many times do I have to tell you that it was a million years ago! I don't get to chose who I work with. What do you want me to do? Quit?" Her father's voice shouts again.


"They're not fighting. They're not fighting," she continues, "they're not fighting!"


She ends up screaming the words without noticing. Soon, her own shouts begin to drown out those of her parents, so she continues.


As the words bounce off the walls, Riley starts to believe them.


She keeps on shouting for a few minutes. Somewhere between that time, she begins to cry again.


Without a moments notice, the tears enter her mouth. As the salty taste envelopes her tongue, she stops shouting.

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