𝐄𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 (𝐂𝐅)

𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐭𝐲 𝐬𝐢𝐱- 𝐒𝐞𝐚𝐟𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐜𝐤

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I honked my horn outside the house waiting for Susanna. We were going out for lunch today, After yesterday speaking to Shayla I noticed I couldn't avoid the house all together, I was ready to meet Susanna at the restaurant.

She walks out, a massive smile plastered on her face. I did invite my mum along but she apparently was doing 'book stuff' which was obviously code for going to meet Cleveland, another writer who summered at cousins.

She gets in the car taking a deep breath. "I know you're just a couple of roads away but your presence is very missed." She pulls me in for a quick but loving hug.

"Where we going for lunch then? My treat." She wiggles her eyebrows at me. "I was thinking... seafood shack?" She nods her head as I start the car and we drive into town, singing along to cousins radio.

I park the car and we head into in the restaurant sitting at the table by the window looking at the menu. "Wow this all looks so good!" They must've updated the menu as it was all new stuff.

"This place is a vegans worst nightmare." I joke as Susanna cracks up. We order a bottle of wine to share, Susanna insisting but also telling me to keep it hidden from my mum.

"So you exited for Deb ball?" She asks pouring us both a glass of wine. "I guess, I don't know I'm more nervous, dancing in front of all those people." I shake my head taking a sip of the wine.

"You'll be amazing, you're both good dancers. Remember connie was the one who taught you." I furrow my eyebrows, did she think Conrad was taking me?

"Conrad? I'm going with Jamie." I correct her as her expression changes. "Oh." She says before plastering a smile back on her. "Come on what you thinking." I smile at her, though I was worried. Susanna is usually very good at being upfront with people in a nice way. She usually bites her tongue when it's something that can't be turned nice.

"Ellie, I know you and Conrad have been together. That morning when I knocked on your door. I know it's invasion of your privacy and I'm so sorry for that but I stayed after you closed the door. I heard Conrad was in your room."

"Susanna I-"

"Please I know what it's like to be young summering at cousins." She smiles putting my anxiety at ease. "But I heard you guys laughing, I don't know I've never heard you two laugh like that." She shakes her head slightly.

"Like what?" I ask as she looks away from me as she tries to describe it. "Like you did when you were kids, so pure and real. It was beautiful to listen to." I felt myself think about my time with Conrad.

When we're together we did laugh, I didn't even notice till now how much I did. The thought was nice, which only made it hurt more.

"I guess I misjudged and just assumed there was more going on and that he was taking you to the ball. I'm sorry for overstepping." She grabs my hand squeezing it tightly.

"Don't apologise Susanna, what you said..." I was going to tell her, about how I was love with her son, in love with the Conrad fisher I grew up with, at one point I thought I hated. It was on the tip of my tongue but as I looked at Susanna, something stops me.

Susanna was dying, my problems were so tiny in comparison, I wanted to focus on something positive to talk about us, for the both of us.

"It was nice. Anyways what is going on with my mum and this famous author?!" I switch the subject along smoothly already feeling relief. "You didn't hear this from me but she sneaks out and goes to his house, and the other day asked belly what verified was." We both crack up laughing before we order our food.

The food was lovely. Susanna insured on paying since I drove us here but I made her let me pay for the wine. We spoke more about the Deb ball on the way home, just some tips and advice she had on her experience doing it.

I pull up to the driveway turning the car off as the radio turns off leaving silence. "This was lovely El, I really needed it." She places a hand on my hair stroking it softly. "If I had all the money in the world I would go out to lunch with you everyday." I say making her smile and that's when I see tears prick her eyes ever so slightly.

"Well I best get back into the mad house, you coming in or going straight to Shayla's?" She asks as I quickly look at the house seeing Conrad's light on. "I'm gonna go straight to Shayla's. We've got a movie night planned." She nods her head leaning over she hugs me kissing my cheek on the way out.

She leaves the car waving goodbye before she closes the front door. I look at the front door contemplating whether to go in or not. I miss everyone, and the fact it's the last week.

That's when I see Conrad stood at his window, holding his curtain open looking at my car. We catch each others gaze. It felt like a staring contest, neither of us looking away. All I wanted to do was get out this car, run to his room and lay in his arms.

But I knew I couldn't. That thought alone gave me the step to turn the engine on. I look away as I back out the drive and before I knew it I was halfway down the street. I get why Conrad needs space, because them few seconds seeing him, made the feelings appear all over again.

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