Saudade: Trust

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AN: The birthday party Shawn and Audrey mention is in Birthday Wishes & Valentine Kisses.

The Home Improvement episode mentioned "Haunting of Taylor House" was one Rider Strong guest starred as Danny. HI was filmed next door to BMW.

"Can I ask you somethin'?"

Shawn stared out the windshield of the Yukon. They were parked in a lot across the street from a small two-story house with dusty blue shutters and accents surrounded by a rickety picket fence that had once been white many years ago. Audrey had rented the lower floor from a sweet, old widow who lived on the upper level.

"Of course," Audrey said. Her attention was fully on him.

"What happened to Mrs. Dupree?"

Audrey looked at the aged fence that was struggling to remain standing. Once upon a time, the little house was in immaculate condition from the yard to the interior. Now it was just another worn down house on a street of worn down houses. Trash and junk cluttered the landscape.

"Not long after Jon and I got married, she had a stroke. She never recovered enough to come back here," Audrey told him. She leaned forward and wiped some light dust off the dash with the sleeve of her coat. "She went into a nursing home after she got out of the hospital then passed away about eight years ago. Jon and I visited her when we could. I think her grandkids got this place and well, you can see it didn't mean as much to them as it did to her."

What a waste, Shawn thought. His mind drifted back to all the good times he spent in that little house with his parents. He couldn't remember one unpleasant incident that happened there.

He sighed.

He felt like he was forgetting something.

"I remember plannin' my birthday here," he said quietly, still staring at the house.

Audrey looked at him and smiled. The two weeks leading up to that party on Valentine's day had been a chaotic comedy of sorts.

"It was the only one I ever had."

Sadness washed over her face, and she reached out to him. "I'm surprised Cory didn't force one on you."

He gave a short laugh and leaned an arm against the steering wheel. "He did ask me what I wanted to do for my sixteenth birthday. I wasn't gettin' my license then, so we wandered the neighborhoods on foot, talking; just the two of us. Ended up at Chubbies. Topanga brought cupcakes. She knew I wouldn't want a birthday cake that wasn't made by you."

Audrey squeezed his hand.

"I just never celebrated birthdays," he went on. "A birthday party was tied to you and Dad. I never had one before you and I didn't want one without you. After we moved to New York, and I started travelin' I made sure to spend the day away from everyone. That's one of the reasons I got my place upstate."

This revelation made Audrey upset. "I hope that will change now that you're home."

"Depends," he said giving her a sly smile. "Can I get seven cakes again?"

Fond memories of that birthday overtook the sadness. With a light laugh she said, "I'll make you eight if you spend your birthday with us."

He agreed and kissed the back of her hand. As he lowered her hand down to his knee, he saw her engagement ring sparkle in sunlight that was peeking through the clouds. Very clearly he could recall the day Jon showed it to him and confessed that he bought it at Christmas and came close to proposing to her then.

It was a simple ring: a princess cut diamond on a thin gold band.

Audrey saw him looking at it and gave him a smile tinged with sadness. She knew he was thinking of that Christmas and how a proposal then would have changed everything. "Jon's tried to get me to give him my ring so he can upgrade the diamond."

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