Xiao & Aether angst

二十九

Aether sees people (alive ppl) doing weird things he knows they wouldn't do.

Result of the following: Post traumatic stress, panic disorder, major depressive disorder, generalized anxiety disorder.
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Aether slams his bedroom door, leaning against the old oak. On the other side, a familiar voice calls. "Aether, what's the matter?" A voice whispers sweetly, Aether hears the fiddling of the doorknob. Over and over, clicking, turning, banging.

Pattering in his chest, he tries to calm himself down. "Xiao's not here.. he's not here." Aether reminds himself as the room goes silent. The blond is hyperventilating, holding his heart as if it were to explode. He runs a hand through his hair, pulling it harshly. Needing a spark, a way to bring him back to earth.

"Not real.. not real." Aether kept repeating to himself, frantically searching the run. "What's real?! What's fucking real?!" The blond grabs his blade, sliding his thumb against the silver.

"Pain.. I need pain," The blond quivers. His lover is alive and well, he knows it's true. Xiao is out doing some other activities. So why does it feel so real? Why does he hear Xiao? Why does his mind play tricks like this?

He hears Xiao's footsteps outside the door. It's a soft tap, light footsteps, almost as if he weren't even there.

Aether slices his finger on the blade, watching the blood seep out of the wound. This action brought him back to earth, as he falls to his feet. Heaving, feeling his skin crawl. As if millions of bugs were crawling all around him. His ears rang loudly, in a pathetic attempt to stop it he covered his ears.

"Make it stop," He hiccuped, trying to hold in a sob. Suddenly, he feels a hand on his shoulder as he freezes.

"Traveler~" Xiao whispers, voice breathy, his hand is as cold as ice.

Aether tenses up, feeling the tears fall down his cheeks. "You're not Xiao.. are you?"