The Beast Within

Titans in the Distance: Chapter One

I was lost.

Ambrosia had been my family. My love. And like all the other people in my life who made me happy she'd been taken away. 

I thought of the Hag Dancer and wished more than ever to see her again, so I could speak to Ambrosia one last time.

I blamed myself for not joining Phelan on his grand adventure around the world, for if I had made the right choice Ambrosia would be alive. Everywhere I went death was waiting. It clung to me like a shadow, and I realized no one would ever be safe as long as I was near. I decided to do the world a favor and leave its inhabitants alone.

Out of spite, I refused to change back into a human and took comfort in hearing the wolf's melancholy howls ring through the trees. I hoped there were humans nearby, and the sound made them afraid. I withdrew into myself to wallow in despair, trying to forget the names and memories I held dear, and took little notice of what my beastly other half was doing.

When it had no voice left to cry with the wolf resigned to waste away, and I didn't comfort or try to stop it.

Because of this, some smaller animals grew boldly antagonistic.

"There goes a big, bad wolf," they'd tease, "when he starves we'll feast on him for a change."

They'd climb on its body and nip at its ears. Creatures that used to flee from its sight drew close enough to paw at its snout before scampering away giggling. Eventually they grew bored with the pitiful predator and left it alone.

For days the wolf continued this way, and without food in its belly it began to see visions of things that were not real.

A pair of siblings walked from behind a tree, and while their faces were familiar I could not remember their names. They looked healthy but frightened. Naïve.

"Where is your home?" the wolf asked but the children looked at it with disgust before running.

Not long after, the wolf collapsed. We had forgotten our oath to spread light throughout the world. We had forgotten our quest to find my sister. The emptiness inside was flooded by a river of tears. We barely remembered why there was a pain in our hearts that drove all other emotion away.

The only path left was to die, so the wolf closed its eyes and welcomed eternal sleep.

A squeaky voice shouted from overhead.

"Got another one for ya, Otto!"

The wolf did not open its eyes.

"Ooo-eee! Looks to be a sturdy one, Grapes! Nice and big!"

"She's a beauty, I'm proud to say. Do us a favor and give her a good blow of air!"

"Happy to!"

There was a soft clattering, like someone breaking wood with a dozen tiny hammers.

"I'm on a roll today, Otto! Have another for ya in just a second!"

"Where do you find the time, Grapes?"

"Someone's gotta keep the sky full."

"Saw something below with fur. Looked soft. Think you could snatch a few for the next batch?"

There was no further conversation, just rounds of quiet banging with the occasional tiny grunt.

Something landed on the wolf's back, as gentle as a snowflake, and then tiny feet were scrambling through the fur, leaving shivers as they moved. The feet climbed to the wolf's head and it felt like something was dancing right above its face.