Captured Hearts

Fair fights, playing dirty

Dean 

I woke up and my vision was blurred, I saw strings of lights, and moving blobs as I heard voices around me. I could smell burning, almost like someone had singed their hair. I was hot and yet my skin damp with sweat causing my shirt to stick to my skin like an old paper mache school project gone wrong. It honestly felt like I was in the pits of hell.  

I had no idea where I was or how I got to this place but I knew it had to be the work of the spy; the mole. I was so close to finding out who was responsible for betraying me and my brethren. I had the Gambinos in place and the money ready to pay them for the name they would acquire. Only, the last thing that I remember is talking with one of my men who was joining me for the money transfer. 

Now I was confident that the Gambinos didnt double cross me, not when the agreed amount was 50k, all for a name. It's easy work, anyone can and would do it. They had no reason to betray me or my trust and by extension the trust of my father who would've had their heads. He would not stand for such betrayal, he suggested I put a bullet in all my men's heads and started from scratch by finding new men to be my associates who would work their way up under me. I hate to admit it, but that would have been easier than breaking my back on the daily to impress Davide's old men and pray I earn their respect. 

Father believes respect is earned and not given or threatened but when these men are already loyal to my sociopath of a brother I know I have a challenge ahead. Shooting them all would be a fuck ton easier, only I am not my brother who takes enjoyment from peoples suffering or pain. Also I know father likes to tie loose ends quickly but I valued the life of all those men willing to be loyal over any of the few who may have betrayed me. I valued them enough to only end the ones who had in fact betrayed me. 

Now I am here, locked away with a throbbing head while people are talking around me like I simply do not exist. Treating me like no less than dirt or dog dung off the bottom of their shoe! Whoever attacked me shall pay for this. I wince in pain as my head continues to throb and what I assume to be blood drips down my forehead and over my brow into my sore swollen eye.

I was meant to be having dinner with my girl later, I left her a note and honestly hoped to really talk, I know I have fucked up! 

I planned to get a large true Italian pizza, after all I once said I would bring her to Italy and when she tasted real pizza she would understand why I strongly dislike any other form of it. I had not had real true pizza from Italy since I visited Dad around the age of sixteen. I hated going to visit him, he wanted me to train with my brother so oneday when he took over I would be his underboss, only that was not what I wanted. 

Pizza was the highlight of coming to Italy, only I soon learned it was fathers way of bribing me into doing the things he wanted. It was like a payment for agreeing to train. That was until I realized it was a fake and meaningless sentiment. I then resented pizza and all the blood shed I saw before being given pizza! It was an empty sentiment, not like mum's chicken stew which was home made and cooked with love. 

Only my Caris loved pizza, in all forms even the greasy and dirty takeaway kind. She would devour any pizza and seeing it bring her joy and making her happy dance was enough to stop me hating the dish. 

She is my world, only I know I need to do better. That's what tonight was supposed to be about

Now I am stuck in a life I never wanted, one I in fact rejected and I don't blame Caris but if I had never met her and fell in love I never would have made such a deal with my father to save her.  

Only I am thankful that I have her, she has given me purpose because without her I would have lived a dull life where I would have nothing to look forward to at the end of the day. Even through the last few weeks where we have barely spoken, I work hard and fight hard just to climb into bed next to her every night.