The Walls We've Built - ◈ ARMIN ARLERT X OC ◈

Chapter 25 - Memories

The wind pushing against my face keeps the adrenaline in my muscles thriving. I glide through the streets of Stohess following Monique. My eyes subconsciously continue to watch Eren and the Female titan battle an unfair fight, Eren has a clear disadvantage, it's obvious. The female titan knows how to use her ability to her advantage while Eren can barely dodge her punches, he is struggling to keep up, and at this pace I don't think he will for much longer.

I push forward, but the sharp pain in my upper arm is becoming harder to ignore. Monique speeds up in front of us, I engage my ODM gear which thrusts me forward, faster and more intense than before. The excitement of being in the air keeps the throbbing at bay. I see the Female's attacks at Eren come to an abrupt stop, she turns away from him and makes her way towards the wall. I feel my stomach drop further as Mikasa starts speeding up ahead of us. Trying my best, I use my ODM gear to keep up with the others, however a sudden shock of pain to my arm fills my mind. I look down at my arm to see the belt has come undone, shit. I can't attend to it now, so the unbearable pain begins eating at my focus.

"Eren!" Mikasa screams, bringing me out of my own head.

I try to keep up my pace with Gen and Monique, but the tears prickling at my eyes blur my vision, get a grip Zariya, crying is for the weak as life has shown you many times before. I rub my eyes with my good hand, trying to stop thinking about my arm. To keep my mind preoccupied I continue to watch Eren. I am met by the surprising sight of Eren moving with more agility than the Female Titan, he gains on her at a quick pace, pushing me to do the same.

Eren suddenly pounces at her back, grabbing on to her as they go crashing into a bridge. The smoke produced from the destruction affects our visibility, but we push forward. I blindly manoeuvre my way past obstacles in front of me as they come. Surprisingly given my condition my reaction speed is still very agile. I aim my ODM gear accordingly and make my way through the streets as the smoke begins to settle.

Once we have made our way out of the smoke I see a group of scouts atop a building watching Eren and the Female's fight unravel. We continue to follow Mikasa in their direction, landing on the roof calling his name again desperately. Gen, Monique and I reach the roof not long after. We approach the group consisting of Hange, Adam, Moblit, Jean and Armin. As we walk towards them, Armin catches my eye as he looks at me with a concerned expression across his face. I give him a reassuring smile before he turns back to watch the fight. I slowly drag my feet across the roof as the pain in my arm is becoming harder to ignore. I see new stains of blood seeping through my jacket sleeve, I try to readjust the belt but misplace my foot almost falling over my own feet.

Quickly regaining my balance I look at my hand to see it's covered in a mixture of fresh blood, sweat and dust. My vision begins to fade in and out and it becomes hard to stand up straight.

"Zariya!" I hear Rosette yell at me but her voice sounds too far away.

My vision is blurred as I sense Rosette's presence behind me, the dizziness of using my ODM gear and the pain in my arm has become too much to bear, every aching muscle, cut, migraine, wound in my body devours me whole.

I feel the tears running down my face but I'm too weak to lift my hand to wipe them away. When did I become this week, emotional kid that doesn't know how to deal with minor inconveniences. The more I think about it the less time it takes me to realise, I have always been this way, since the day I was born. For my entire childhood I had Nick there to keep my weakness away and when he died I shut it down before my emotions could even set in. But now, lying here close to broken on this rooftop, I can finally come to terms with it. This is the way I've been wired, with emotionally and physically absent parents my entire childhood, having to watch the only person I truly cared about and loved die in front of me, of course this is who I am. I don't see how I could be any different, not given the circumstances in which I was raised.