⚠️IT; LᴏSᴇRs CʟUʙ IᴍAɢIɴEs! ⚠️

Literary practice with a trashmouth.

Hey.
Tis' I, that one writer that is barely active anymore.

So I noticed how I returned to this book just to check up on it and maybe reread some of the cringier chapters for my own suffering and embarrassment, and I realized this book had 10k reads. I just wanna say thank you, and that I never expected it to get even half as far. I'm grateful for every user that decided to give this book a chance, and to show my gratitude, I'll be presenting to you a new actual chapter. It is a bit short, as it isn't something I usually write. But without further ado, Enjoy.

(I love you all so much like you have no idea how happy I was to see this like omg you're so attractive, you're so hot marry me please I'm barely motivated to write anymore due to my sudden interest in stupid ass politics but you guys encourage me to keep going 𓂸𓂸𓂸𓂸𓂺𓂺𓂺)

Literary practice with a trashmouth.

Richie Tozier, just your average dead humor having teen boy. He's not very bright, certainly doesn't get super good grades. Loves "your mom" jokes. Well what is he to do when he needs to write a college essay for a school assignment? He's gonna convince his friends to help him of course. Only it isn't gonna be easy. Like at all.
_____________________________________________________

"Okay, Richie, you need to write it as "you're" not "your"."

"What's the fucking difference!?!?"

_______________________________________________

"Richie, you're not even trying."
Stan spoke in an annoyed and bored tone. He and the rest of the losers have been trying to help Richie with this assignment for hours now. They all already finished their essays, while Richie's was already a day late.

"I'll give a dollar to the person who does this for me."

"Nuh-No, Richie. Y-Yuh-You need to do this yourself."

"Only a dollar?"

"Eddie, don't."

"Why do we even need to write a stupid essay!? We aren't gonna be in college for another 5 years!"

"Because if you write it right now, you could keep it and send it in if it's good enough to get you into a college."

"I'm not keeping this dumb thing for 5 years!"

"Can we just move on? We're wasting time here."

Y/N added on.

"What am I even supposed to write about in here? Bell peppers? I don't even know what college I wanna go to yet!"

"Just write about your middle school experience, and what you look forward to after you graduate. it's really not that hard, Richie."

Beverly added on to the conversation.

"Well you have red hair!"

"Okay, okay, shut the fuck up. I got this. I will explain this to you in words you can actually understand."

Eddie spoke, looking over Richie's paper. But then he paused as his eyes scanned over Richie's work.

"Richie...this isn't gonna work. Your handwriting is so bad that I can't tell of those are words or fucked up drawings."

"Well that's amazing. Now we have to teach you how to write."
Y/N spoke in a sarcastic tone.

"Fuck you guys."

"Just throw the whole paper away. We'll start new."
Stan instructed, as he crumpled up Richie's current "essay" tossing it into the trash bin and setting down a new, blank piece of paper.

"Okay, so you start with a greeting-"

"Hi."

"No, Richie. You need to start with "dear admissions' office" or else they won't take you seriously."

"That's stupid as fuck!"

"Actually it's a good thing. They can't let just anybody in. You need to have a good enough knowledge of literary and writing to be able to write a professional letter, so that they know you take their school seriously."
Ben remarked.

"Okay I appreciate the help here, but I could be playing street fighter right now."

"Yeah, you could if you actually took the time out of the school day to do this essay."
Stan said sternly.

"This whole thing is irritating. And you guys aren't making it any better."

"Okay then we'll leave and you can do it by yourself."

"Okay I'm sorry! I'll be serious now!"

"You said that over an hour ago."

"I'm for real this time. I swear on my mom's life."

"That's a pretty serious swear."

"Well I mean it."

"Whatever you say then. So you greet yourself, and then make sure to tell them why you are writing. Oh and make sure you capitalize all "I's"-"

"Why though? It's not like it matters."

"...9%¥*#•!834$/127$!.€<£¥^#-"
Stan said.

And that marks the date of the day that Maggie Tozier died of unknown causes.

Anyways, I had fun writing this one, and I am thinking about writing more on this book again. Let me know your ideas and requests that I should do. I can't promise that I'll get to it right away, as I don't update this book very often anymore, but I probably would if I had more reasons to. Anyways, thanks for reading this new, creative little chapter. And I hope you find some other books that fit your standards, have a nice day, make sure to drink water, and please don't deprive yourself.
Sincerely,
The person who wrote this
(Originally known as: Fairchildisdead)
(Currently known as: Moon-Cycle).