my tears ricochet

Chapter 104

Michonne looked more disturbed at being dragged out of bed than she was at Beth and Ivy's casual break in of the townhouse. They had set off at an ungodly early hour that made Beth curse at Ivy as she helped pry the window up from the other side so it was almost soundless -the window itself having been liberated with the removal of the sling- and the woman barely looked at them twice before she started brewing coffee.

Eventually the coffee supply would dry up. Carol kept handing off black tea to try and stretch the amount that they had but no one was entirely willing to make the switch until they had no other choice. "It's considered bad manners to be breaking and entering," she warned them as she added a pitcher of goat's milk to the table and let Beth rummage for sweeteners in the pantry. Bob's supply of honey was scattered between the clinic and the pantry supply but he had a few jars tucked at the back of the canned goods like he was trying to hide it.

Ivy gingerly stretched out her arm and felt the tenderness of it. "Well, we're here."

They had crept into the room and pointedly stared at Michonne until she woke up. Tyreese hadn't even heard the door opening or shutting. "Yeah. I see that," Michonne sniped back lightly. "Stop getting in the way and sit down."

The coffee whined as it started to finish the brew cycle. If she closed her eyes, she could pretend that it was the beginning, a table crowded with everyone shoved together.

Ivy forced her eyes to stay open. She couldn't afford to be soft by the past. They took seats at the table and Sasha surprised them by coming down the stairs before Michonne and into the room. "I thought you had the day off?" Sasha asked Michonne as she plucked a mug for herself.

"Not everyone got the memo," Michonne said dryly. "Do you mind if Sasha sits in for this?"

Ivy nodded her consent. She had dragged Beth which meant it was only fair to give Michonne someone to sit with her. "I don't want to talk about this with my dad," she said plainly, crossing her arms to try and establish some air of authority. "Which is why we're here this early."

"Yeah, does he know you're running around Alexandria?" Sasha pointed out. She swirled a spoon into her coffee to mix the honey in properly. "Because if he wakes up and finds that you've booked it—"

"I left a note," Ivy said honestly, cutting her off. He was probably still going to freak out if he woke up before she had the chance to get back first. "He'll be okay."

Beth was silent. Her hands wrapped around the mug tight and Ivy knew that as happy as their reunion had been, the other girl was still angry at the plan she had devised with Rick. Ivy had promised to bring home everyone safe.

She just hadn't factored herself into that promise.

And Beth still had residual anger and betrayal that came with that false-truth promise.

"I don't know much. My memory from the beginning... I know that I was in the Sanctuary when it all started to fall apart for them. Negan was supposed to kill me. I needed to be distraction, something to make the Saviours feel like they had a win. But he didn't kill me," Ivy faltered, unspooling her memory and trying to chase it backwards. "But I think he knew what was happening. Negan let Rick kill him so he'd become a martyr for his people, something to keep them going."

"Rosita killed Negan," Michonne corrected gently. "They lured him back to the clearing."

Rosita deserved that victory. Abraham had died so awfully, completely ruined from the violence of one man's sport. Ivy couldn't forget how gentle Abraham had looked on the RV that night, looking like he was trying to memorize the shape of her hands, and in the clearing when he had tried to keep her upright with he force of his own grip on her arm. "We both agreed that I was never going to get the killing blow on him. Negan had to die, but I wouldn't be the thing to bring him down. I just... I needed to die in that moment to give someone else the opportunity."