if without you. woosan

05

"The waves are stopping you?
just cut through them
the wind is blowing hard?
ride on that wind and fly"
-win (ateez)

꒷꒦ ; ch. 05: a peak behind the curtains

trigger warning; slight panic attack!

most teenagers would say they feel like they've become aware of their consciousness and their existence at the age of 10 and below. and wooyoung was one of them, it was just that, the world that he'd woken up in wasn't what he have expected it to be at all.

what most kids experience at the age of 10 would be going to elementary school, playing with their friends during recess and circling in the reading corner to snack or to gossip, or even join their tables together to eat lunch together.

but the ten year old wooyoung's was different. he would go to class by himself, slumping due to the heaviness of his backpack. he would often be laughed at for living in poverty and for having no parents. he didn't argue back, it was partly correct. although he is living with his old man, he wasn't a father figure. and wooyoung was young, he was gullible, so he went with the flow. letting the pampered kids make fun of him, it was fine as long as he was with them, he'd endure it for as long as he wouldn't be excluded from the circle of friends.

friends? the wooyoung now scoffed at the word. he was so pathetic, and there's no denying that he still is to this date. here he was, standing a few meters away from his classmates who have already partnered into twos. there were a few students who was standing alone, but none of them looked his way, as if they were deliberately staying away from him, denying his existence.

he was hurt, but he swallowed it and shrugged heavy feeling away. he can always work individually, which was a given since he'd never been the team player type of person. 

he sauntered towards his teacher, rehearsing in his mind what he would say to her. when he neared her, he stood fumblingly in front of her desk with a safe distance. "teacher,"

his teacher hummed in return, when she saw wooyoung, a bright smile appeared on her face. "ah mr. jung! I have something for you," she rummaged through the files on her desk and finally pulled out a black folder, handing it to wooyoung.

wooyoung stood bewildered, his eyes flickering to the black folder and back to his teacher, "um...?"

his teacher interrupted him with a gasp, "oh, you didn't know? mr. choi asked me to hand this to you."

"mr. choi?" wooyoung asked with a frown, choi? it rang a bell, but it can't be him right? it's his third day here and he hasn't seen that guy enter this class during those days. he racked his brain trying to find another guy with the family name choi but his mind would always bring him back to the raven-haired choi—

"-san" his teacher's voice snapped him out of his trance, wooyoung blinked his eyes and tilted his head with a confused look, "I said he's your partner, choi san"

wooyoung's brain almost blew up, what? they were in the same class all along? how come he have never seen the latter present? was choi san that type of student? the type who looked prim and proper but is actually the total opposite, ah, wooyoung's head started to ache. but didn't san offer to lend him his notes? wouldn't that mean he was an industrious student? or was that a deceptive lie to put up a good front?

"-usy, so he's not here"

wooyoung snapped out of his thoughts and blinked twice, "im sorry?"

the teacher frowned and crossed her arms, leaning back on her chair. "mr. jung, you're not very focused today, are you?"