Synchronised Motion (BoyxBoy)

Chapter 19

A few weeks have passed, (three to be exact), And things are alright. Maybe even good, but say good and you got something to lose. And having something to lose.. now thats dangerous stuff. 

But things are alright. Really alright. 

I still go to bed late—but less late. An hour earlier actually. My class participation has been the highest it's been so far, (still not that good though). I'm eating better, thinking more about food that's going to give more energy so I can swim better. Even some green shit in there. 

Coincidence. 

I'v started bringing lunches to campus, a drink bottle too. I'm ignoring my Fathers messages because I know it will make a pit in my stomach so much bigger and so much more consuming. I taking some vitamin crap that is 'supposed' to make your ion and immunity good. 

Coincidence. 

So what if I'm being a semi-goodboy? I can be not-toxic and self-sabotaging... Sometimes. 

Jokes on him, Oliver and his stupid words didn't affect. Of course not. Pfff. Whatever. I just decided that I should probably get my shit together before nationals. And I decided, that maybe, if I want to be as good as I want to be, I need to start treating myself as something good. As someone who deserves good. 

Who knew it would just take so much damn discipline. Like a constant nagging parent in your head. It's exhausted. But my shoulders feel a little lighter and body doesn't feel like a fucking zombie. All these coincidences have been making me feel better. I have never felt so... in control. Like, I have some semblance of control over my life and future, and maybe, just maybe, I can handle this all. Like maybe if I lose at nationals for swimming, (which it is looking that way), it will be alright. 

The world won't end. 

The sun will keep on rising. 

Andy will still be a virgin.

Different but the same. Its going to be just fine. Things will be okay, I've decided. I will be okay. Maybe I'll have a bruised ego and be in a sour mood for a day or two—but I'll survive. I still have good things going for me, and good things that will happen that I can't even see yet. 

So I've started trying to take the other parts of my life a bit more seriously, like study. I even talked to someone in class the other day. It was just to ask him for a pen, it wasn't really to even talk to the guy, I just forgot my pen. (Not that I actually took notes, just doodled). 

Anyway, the guy took that as an opening to talk my ear off for the rest of class. So now we sit next to each other in class. It's cool. Whatever. He talks too much, and sometimes I regret initiating conversation. Other times we go to the campus coffee shop and study together, or at least say we are going to.

Swimming is swimming, I guess. With nationals looming, coach has been riding our arses. And I've been keeping my head down and doing the work. The morning training aren't as shit, when I actually get more than 4 hours of sleep. Funny that. 

And Oliver...

We're fine.

Alright.

Sometimes (most times), I'm the last one to finish dressing in the changing rooms. And Oliver is too.

Coincidence. 

And somehow our lips find each other when everyones gone—and his hand in my pants. I'm not complaining. Nope. I give it right back tenfold, and Oliver takes it all with a grin on his lips and a spark in his eyes.