Struggling with depression and a stalled career, Molly, a once-promising writer stumbles upon a mysterious file titled 'Where Dead Dreams Go'. On a whim, she follows its lead to Damgo Island where she meets Golda, a quirky chairwoman and a cancer su...
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"I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear." ― Nelson Mandela
Chapter 21: Finally, a Conqueror
[Molly's POV]
SLEEP all day. That's why I did when I came back home.
Hindi ako umuwi sa apartment ko, for some reasons ay mas ginusto kong umuwi sa bahay ng parent's ko. My mom was delighted, halata namang na-miss niya ako dahil sandamakmak ang pagkaing niluto niya kahit tatlo lang kami nila dad dito.
My siblings were already living their lives with their own families. Ang bunso ko namang kapatid ay nagdo-dorm na kasi malapit sa university na pinapasukan niya.
Nakatulog ako nang mahimbing at nagising ako na parang napuno ang baterya ko. Marahil iba talaga kapag nasa comfort place kung saan ka lumaki. I couldn't help but to be sad, parang kailan lang ay magkakasama at kumpleto kaming lahat sa bahay na 'to.
Somehow I felt my parents' loneliness in this big house that used to be filled with our noise. I still don't want to dwell on the sadness that my parents are already growing old and we're also living our lives on our own.
Sino bang may sabi na madali ang adulting?
Nadama ko rin ang pagkamiss sa'kin ni dad dahil panay ang tanong niya tungkol sa kung anong bagong libro kong sinusulat. Wala silang kaalam-alam ni mom sa issue na kinasangkutan ko noon at pati sa naging karelasyon ko after Garnet. They're not that techy enough to explore social media kaya hindi nila nakita ang trending news noon tungkol sa'kin.
Ignorance is bliss, sabi nga nila. Mas mainam nang wala silang alam kaysa mag-alala pa sila sa'kin.
Pero . . . iyon ang pinipilit kong isipin noon.
Ang totoo niyan ay ayoko lang na madisappoint sila sa'kin kapag nalaman nila na nakipag-lived in ako at hindi ko alam na may pamilya ang taong pinagkatiwalaan ng puso ko.
Siguro kaya rin matagal akong nagdusa dahil pinili kong itago 'yon at mamuhay ng may unconscious shame sa sarili ko. It was fear all along that enslaved me.
And that fear led me to believe in a delusion—the delusion that I'm in love with a dead person, the delusion that Cole is making me follow a thread that was not really there in the first place.
I decided to confess everything to my parents but now is not the right moment. . . Because I had to deal with something that I discovered.
Nakaupo ako sa gilid ng kama ko habang hawak-hawak ang Lapis Lazuli stone na binigay ni Cole sa'kin noong gabing nasa ospital kami, 'yung gabi bago siya mamatay.
