How To Become A Unicorn

Step 3

This is the most daunting step to becoming a unicorn. Every night for an entire month you must complete the summoning ritual for the unicorn spirit. But not just any month. It has to be January. Why Januaru? Because January has snow. This ritual must take place in the snow at the beginning of a new year.

First one must gather the proper materials. These materials are marshmallows, wine glasses, and rainbow cupcake scented candles.

You must surround yourself with these candles in a circle and light each of them except the one facing the north because the cold winter winds need to give the unicorn spirit a way into the candle circle. Then you must fill the wine glasses with water in different amounts. You must have one wine glass for each hand and you must slightly wet your fingers. Then lightly glide your wet fingers around the rim of the wine glasses to produce a ringing sound. Once you have your sound going you must chant these words over and over:

"I unicorn, unicorn wherefore art thou unicorn."

Start the chant at precisely 11:57 p.m. and repeat the chat over and over until you end at precisely 12:01 a.m. Be very careful that you don't mess up even a single word because you will have to wait until the next January to completely start over this process.

After this step is complete you have one more final step to become a unicorn.