❝ Sometimes, though not often, he had dreams, and they were more painful than the dreams of other boys. For hours he could not be separated from these dreams, though he wailed piteously in them. They had to do, I think, with the riddle of his existence. ❞
~~~
Whitney listened intently to Niall. His face was struggling to remain passive, but his eyes gave him away. They were as lost as he felt. She was genuinely concerned for him, and honestly? She missed the Niall that she had initially met: the laughing, carefree, annoying Niall. His moody, snappy, troubled self unnerved her.
“Do you ever get that feeling where you don’t want to deal with anything?”
She nodded.
“I mean, I love our fans and the opportunities I’ve had, but I don’t know,” Niall breathed, trying to maintain a calm composure. “I-I’ve always kinda felt like people never considered my feelings, y’know? I’m just a chess piece that people get to move around.”
He rambled on and on about his tangled emotions. How he felt suffocated from the pressure. How he felt like he didn’t want to be in One Direction sometimes. How he felt depressed without knowing why. How he shut people out at everyone because he felt trapped in an unforgiving life. How he felt constantly scrutinized by the public.
“Finding myself here,” he gestured to Neverland, “doesn’t exactly help. I just...” Niall struggled to find the right words. “I just want everything to stop. I want to feel – I want to be normal. I can’t even be normal in a coma. I have to avoid everyone so they don’t find out I’m here.” He clenched his fists. “I’m just so fucked up, aren’t I?”
Whitney chewed her lip thoughtfully, brushing a stray lock of her long brown hair out of her face. “So the pressure’s catching up to you.” She waited for an indication that her guess was correct. When he nodded slightly, she asked, “That’s it?”
“That’s it? That’s it?” Niall sputtered. “What, is there anything else that should worry me?”
“No, don’t take it the wrong way,” she corrected herself. “I was just asking. Is there anything else? Any problems with friends? Family?” Whitney paused before adding, “Girls?”
He let out a sardonic laugh, startling Whitney. “Girls,” he scoffed. “I haven’t had a girlfriend since One Direction.”
Whitney was taken aback at his blunt retort. “Seriously? But...” she trailed off when he glared at her. She finished her sentence in her mind. But aren’t you famous? Not to mention you’re good looking and pretty cool even though you can be annoying sometimes. How do you not have a girlfriend?
Wait a minute.
She mentally facepalmed. Not that I like him or anything! I’m just saying he’s hot and oh my God you need shut up and stop talking to yourself, Whitney.
YOU ARE READING
Somewhere In Between // Niall Horan
Fanfiction[DISCONTINUED] Whitney Davies has been oblivious to the world for three years, but you can't blame her. It isn't her fault she's stuck in Neverland. Not the Neverland you know and love, though. This is a different place, where there aren't any...
