Bitch, PLEAAAAAASE

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ATTENDANCE; PLEASE SAY 'HERE' IN THE COMMENTS

THERE ARE A LOT OF YOU, I AIN'T LISTING EVERYONE SO JUST... SAY HERE

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"Hey, lil' maniac," Kristie waved as you accepted her FaceTime call. "You on the bus?"

"Hey, Crotch," you tipped your head in acknowledgment while buckling your seat. "Yeah, we're on the bus, why?"

"Mom and Dad and I are coming to the game."

Your eyes snapped to your phone. "And what jersey are ye' wearin'? It better not be that ugly Man City blue."

"We're not wearing jerseys, since you two knuckleheads would get mad," she responded. "Mom, Dad, say hi."

Faintly, you could hear your parents' greeting in the background.

"We're almost to the stadium. Don't embarass Sam too much, please."

"I will, bye Crotch!"

"Motherfu—"

You hung up the phone, snapping your fingers at Lauryn. "Oi, pretty girlfriend of mine, I've gotta tell ye' summin'."

"Yeah?" She questioned, placing her phone down next to the cup holder.

"Kristie's gonna be at the game."

Her face turned white. "Shit."

"You'll be fine," Lina patted Lauryn on the shoulder reassuringly. "Y/N'll protect you."

You smiled apologetically. "Me parents are comin' too."

"Fuck!"

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"Oh, Sammy Stokbrood, fancy seeing you 'ere," you chirped, roughly slamming your hands down onto her shoulders. "Ready to lose?" (Baguette)

"Oh, shut it," she rolled her eyes before turning to your fidgety girlfriend. "So, you're the one that managed to tame my beast of a sister."

You feigned offense. "I'm untamable! No, she matches my chaotic energy."

"Oh, joy," the Tower of Power muttered. "Another psycho."

Lauryn shifted nervously on her feet. "It's nice to meet you."

Sam squinted. "Are you two happy?"

Neither of you hesitated. "Yes."

Your older sister shrugged. "Okay, then. Welcome to the family."

Your girlfriend blinked. "Really?"

"Yeah. Just don't break my sister's heart.

"O—okay."

You and Lauryn walked back toward the Gunners, hand-in-hand. "Told ye' it wasn't gonna be so bad."

"I haven't met the rest of your family yet."

"Mewis! Lauryn! Warm up!" Jonas directed.

You rolled your eyes. "Yes, Uncle."

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"Sammy! Watch this!" You beamed, suddenly moving the ball around crazily with your feet as she panicked.

"Shit, not the 'watch this'," Sam huffed. "Why do you have to do this when Mom and Dad are watching?"

You smiled innocently. "Because I feel like it."

You punted the ball into Man City's 6-yard box where Lauryn headed it in just above the Keeper. "Besides, Kristie'll like Lauryn better if she's really good at Football."

"I hate you," Sam mumbled, punching your shoulder jokingly. "You're the worst."

You grunted as your girlfriend tackled you to the floor. "Don't be jealous just because you miss Pat."

"Pat doesn't have anything to do with— what—?"

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"Sam, calm down," Chloe Kelly chided. "It's only a corner, Ellie's got our backs."

"BuT Y/N's tAkInG iT," your sister all but hyperventilated. "Y/N nEvEr mIsSeS tHoSe."

"It's only a corner, Sam," you repeated loudly, your trademark devilish grin resting upon your face. "Your Keeper's got you."

Not a single one of your Arsenal teammates jumped as the ball soared through the air, instead focusing on pushing the Man City women away.

It came as a shock to no one as the ball curled perfectly into the upper 90 of the net, brushing past Ellie Roebuck's fingertips with relative ease.

Sam groaned, crouching down and resting her head in her hands. "Bitch, PLEAAAAASE."

You scratched your head in confusion. "Who's bitch?"

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"Hoi, Mum, Dad," you hugged your parents before side-eyeing your oldest sister. "And Kristie."

She snorted. "And Kristie."

You nodded. "Anyways, guys, this is me girlfriend, Lauryn. Lauryn, darlin', this is me Mum and Dad. And Kristie."

She waved shyly. "Hoi, it's nice to meet you all."

Your mom pulled her into a warm hug. "It's so nice to finally meet you. Y/N hasn't stopped talking about you since you guys started dating last year."

Lauryn's eyes narrowed suspiciously. "That doesn't sound like Y/N."

Your mom laughed. "She knows you so well, Y/N! Don't be offended, sweetie. Y/N doesn't talk about anybody."

"Yes, dearest," you agreed. "You know I love ye' anyways."

"It's good to meet you, Lauryn," your Dad chuckled, giving her hand a shake. "You and Y/N link up on the field well."

"Thank you, sir," Lauryn smiled awkwardly. "I like to think we link up well off the pitch, too."

"None of that 'sir' business, just call me Dad. Or whatever else, you're part of the family now."

She cocked her head to the side, almost hesitant. "No shovel talk?"

Your parents shared a look before your mom spoke up. "That's Kristie's thing. We'll be waiting in the car, Kristie."

"What are your intentions with my sister?" Kristie scowled, crossing her arms menacingly as soon as your parents were out of earshot.

You rolled your eyes, squeezing your suddenly timid girlfriend's hand comfortingly. "We've talked about this, Crotch."

The Midfielder glared at you. "Don't call me that when I'm trying to be intimidating! Actually, just don't call me that."

Lauryn cleared her throat, forcing her eyes to meet your sister's. "I love her. Very much. And I want to spend the rest of me life with her."

"Awww," Kristie cooed. "That's so sweet."

You facepalmed. "How many times did I tell you that me family was gonna love ye'?"

"Welcome to the family!" Kristie wrapped her arms around your surprised girlfriend, ignoring your remark. "You two are so cute together!"

"Oh my god," you sighed. "No one listens to me, I swear."

"I wonder why."

"Yee' shut the fook' up!"

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