ono 99

Deals with The Devil 😈

Before I start I want to thank you for reading! I am excited for you to read my works. If you like this, you'll probably like my other stories like The Enigmas of Ezimanica Pie and Underneath Us.
If you have something you want me to write about, I'd be happy to! Or if you just want to tell me a good writing prompt. Just put it in the comments and I'll try to write it ASAP. I'm not great with all genres, but I can try. I'm best with comedy, so that's probably what most of these stories will be about.

Have fun!
- Asinine

Write a story ab someone making a deal with the devil.

"Okay, I'm just gonna need you to sign right here, please," she said, tapping the clipboard she held with long, red nails.
"Do you know how powerful I am?"
"Do you know how powerful a contract is?" she asks, raising a perfect eyebrow.
"Har har. Your warranties are way overpriced, by the way."
"I don't take complaints. You can call or text this number if you want to give the company constructive criticism."
"What does constructive criticism even mean?"
"I don't know, that's just what I'm paid to say."
"You get paid to say 'constructive criticism'?"
"Technically. It's in the job description, so I also have to do stuff like make you sign right here, please." She tapped the clipboard with her nails again. He just glared at her.
"Look, I didn't come all the way over here to just argue with you about writing your name." She'd dropped the business attitude and had a hand on her hip. "You did call me over here because you wanted extended warranty, did you not?"
"See, I didn't call you. I think my neighbor did. He lives next door. He's probably waiting for you."
"Nice try. Just sign the paper."
"How'd you see through me so fast?"
"You're the only person who has a house down here."
"Fine."
Why won't you just sign the paper?"
"You want the truth? Well, fine! I..."
"What?"
"I have bad handwriting, okay?!"
"Okay, so?"
His eyes darted away. "So...I don't want you to see it."
"There's no way it can be so bad that you're embarrassed to let anyone see it."
"Oh really?"
"I will bet you ten dollars that it's not that bad. Just write your name on this line and we'll see if it's really so bad."
"Fine." He plucked the pen from out of her waiting fingers and scribbled his name on the clipboard.
"Oh that's bad." She dug ten dollars out of her pocket and handed the bill to him.
She looked at her clipboard. "Mr. DeeVil, is it?"
"I don't live under a rock. I know you don't actually think my name is the same as a dognapper's."
"You literally live under the entire Earth."
He squinted. "Touche. It's Devil."
She glanced at her clipboard again. "You have to write your first name."
"I did."
"Where?"
"'The.'"
"'The' is your first name?"
"Yes."
She stared at him.
"Were your parents really that uncreative?"
"Don't you start with my parents!"
"Okay, chill. Why is your name The, though?"
"You really want the story? The whole story? It began at the beginning-"
"You know what, forget it. This sounds like a long story."
"You're so impatient."
"My uber's gonna be here in a minute, and I gotta get home in time for my doordash. I don't want anyone to steal my food."
"Okay, valid. But can you at least give me your business card?"
"What? You're asking for my business card?"
"Yeah."
"You literally just bought from my business."
"No I didn't!"
"Yes you did. You signed right here."
He gasped. "You tricked me!"
"Oh, come off it."
"No! I will not come off it!"